Lightning Strike ||Bakugou Katsuki|| (bxb)

Things that make saying goodbye hard

"Are you awake?" I hear someone ask from behind me, a warm hand settles on my cheek. "Guess not...". I recognized the voice. Katsuki... "Last night was tough for you, wasn't it? I can only guess what your dream was about". He let out a sigh and removes the hand from my shoulder. The window was open and the early dark sky was clear. There was still time left before we need to get ready for school. The bed lets out a quiet creak and he gets up, leaving for the bathroom.

When he closed the door, I let out a breath and lay on my back. There are times I wonder what life means, why we are here and what our purpose in life is. Do we live to die? Is death the end? Or is there something after that? There are times I feel nothing and there are times I feel too much. There are times I feel too little and think too much. Once, way before I met Katsuki, I thought there was no end to this nightmare, to this hell on earth.

Once, I stayed away from everyone.

Once, I blamed everything and everyone for my mistakes.

Once, I thought nothing matters anymore, I'll die anyway.

Once, I hated myself.

Once, I wanted to disappear.

So why don't I kill myself? Why don't I get it over with? Why don't I escape?

Once, I..."I wanted to die". I whisper into the empty room. The door of the bathroom was ripped open and slammed back shut. Footsteps banged on the floorboards as he approached the bed. "What did you just say?" He shakily asked. The bed dipped as he leaned over me. I turn my face to the side, not being able to face him. I didn't want to see the disappointed look on his face. "Hey, look at me?" He took my chin in his hand and turned me to face him.

My tired eyes met his wide open ones. "Repeat what you just said". He ordered, as if he didn't believe his ears.

"I wanted to die". I repeat, louder this time. He recoiled as if he was slapped. A sharp breath escaped his as he disappeared from above me.

There was a minute of silence and then he broke it. "Why?" He asked it with no emotion, but I knew there was a raging tide of emotions inside of him. I pulled myself up and leaned on the wall behind me. "Because... I had no reason to live anymore". Saying those words was easier than I thought, but casting one look at Katsuki told me it wasn't easy for him to hear them. "I had nothing I loved, nothing I liked, no one to lean upon". I continued, and with each word there was a slight pain in my heart.

"What changed your mind?" He asked, still facing away from me. I didn't even need to think before the words left my lips. "Because I found something that made saying goodbye hard". He froze and slowly turned to look at me. There was an unusual expression on his face. His brows were furrowed, lips pressed thin and eyes shining with something unknown. As I give him a pointed look, his eyes widen and his lips open in a silent 'oh'.

"This is going to sound really cliche, but I'm gonna say it anyways". Shifting from my spot, I shuffle to his side and place my hands on his knees. "You saved me and got my heart in return". My heart started hammering in my chest. When I was about to lean back, he brought his hands up and covered my own. "And you have my own". He intertwined our fingers and brought them up, gently brushing his lips over my knuckles.

"I'm glad I met you". I whisper as he trails kisses down my wrist. "And I you". Were the words he uttered, before his lips covered my own. Hands settled on my shoulders and he gently pushed me back onto the bed. Our lips separated when my back met the covers of the bed. He brushed his lips over my cheek and then started kissing down my neck. His fingers sneaked to my hips and slipped under the bottom of my shirt, barely brushing skin. Before he went further, he leaned back. "May I?" At my nod, he continued.