31 | a whole new perspective

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Jungkook's POV

All of my senses are reduced and I can barely tell apart reality from an illusion. And yet the taste of this good quality whiskey lingers on my tastebuds. This bittersweet flavor of leather; or is it cedar wood? Candied almonds and brown sugar. A hint aspect of red chili and perhaps orange pith. With every sip-no every glass I can feel my temperature rise as I can smell this old cardboard scent that comes from the alcoholic beverage itself. I'm sweating through my clothes, I'm so feverish and lightheaded. The tip of my tongue runs against my cheek and finally reaches the outer corner of my mouth. Licking my bottom lip I can taste some more of that old paper and cashews. I gulp down the rest of my drink and notice that the flavor dissolved since the rocks melted in the bourbon substance.

I am intoxicated.

But not from the whiskey.

Even in this state of bewilderment I can't stop thinking about Eye Candy.

I'm so perplexed as to why she would even accept to spend the night with Jimin in this way. I know that she likes him but this crush is only a phase. She can't be that desperate. It's not like she's in love with him. I genuinely tried to make things right and yet she goes out of her way to teach me a lesson. But, now I'm wondering... Does he know about her secret? He can't know. Elena wouldn't dare tell him-she can barely form a coherent sentence in front of him.

I am aware of the fact that I don't deserve her, but I'm too selfish to let her go.

The bartender is wiping a glass clean and I lift my empty glass, signifying another filler. The man approaches my side on the bar a concerning and yet slightly annoyed expression clouding his features.

"So, what is the issue?" He asks when he takes my glass.

I glare daggers at the old man silently implying to mind his own business.

"I don't mean to pry dear sir." The bartender says. "Work can be quite dull and monotonous at times so troubled customers such as yourself can help keep me slightly entertained."

"Do I look like a fucking clown to you?" I snap and the old man laughs.

"No, but you look pretty insecure right now." He observes with a sly grin.

"You don't know a thing about me." I grit. "So mind your own godamn business. Go fraternize with someone who's desperate enough to hang out with some random person."

"Alright then." The old man sighs. "I will take my leave." He then sets my glass on the counter. Empty.

"Okay, I'm sorry." I finally say. "I was rude as hell."

The bartender simply smiles. "Is it a girlfriend problem?"

"Excuse me, sir." I say. "I apologized but that doesn't mean I'll tell you the story of my life."

"So it is a girl problem." He smirks.

"It's not." I huff. "She's not even-" I start and the old man is looking at me with knowing (wrinkled) eyes. Apparently, he has seen many things in life.

"I just can't stop thinking about her." I breathe out in defeat. "Despite what she did."

"Don't tell me you're innocent Dorothy Jesus." He says in a teasing manner.

"I did some horrible shit to her." I admit ashamed even though this man has no clue what exactly it is I did to her. "And the thing is I can't control myself around her. She brings out a whole other side in me when she acts out but when it's just us" I pause unsure of what to say and the bartender motions me to proceed. "I don't know."

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