The Nerdy Bad Girl | completed

Chapter Twenty Three.

Chapter Twenty Three.

Instead of going to Sandra's, I hopped on the bus to my previous hometown - the place I lived before we moved here. There was someone I needed to see. He would always help me when I needed it, and I'd do the same. But he's not here now. The next closest thing is his brother. I had to see Harry. But there was one stop I needed to go first.

***

Forty five minutes later, and I was finally there. I stood in front of Josh's grave.

"Sorry I don't have any flowers for you and the fact I haven't come in a month or so. I'm sorry. I moved houses and school you see. I got expelled. I miss you." I stayed in silence for a few minutes. "You know, life has been pretty messed up since you left us and since I moved. I mean, I have a boyfriend now but he's kind of a jerk. Tony got my first friend at the new school pregnant. They're dating but she's now pregnant. She's my new best friend but don't worry, no one will replace you. Oh, turns out that Ryan is Alex's cousin. Alex is my boyfriend. He bullied you too but I forgave him, it was Ryan that made him. I mean, he didn't actually intend to hurt you and he actually felt bad.. Unlike Ryan. Ryan, I will never forgive him. He ruined your life and my life too. I know I shouldn't forgive Alex but I do, maybe it's cos I really like him, but I don't know."

I looked around, there were a few people visiting their loved ones. It looked as if it were starting to rain.

"It looks like it's about to rain, don't you think? Are you mad at me? It was sunny a minute ago and now I've told you all this it's gloomy and all, if you're mad.. I'm sorry. I really am. I can't help who I fall in love with. You know, you'll always be my best friend and I really, really do miss you. My life has been crap without you. I miss having you around, I miss messing around with you and us playing pranks on people. We were awesome, weren't we? No one stood in our way. You know, I found out why Ryan bullied you.. He's delusional. He said it was because you had something he couldn't and apparently it was me. He wants us to be together and he slapped me. He's crazy, Josh. I just- I just really need you right now." I say, starting to cry. "I should go now, I promise I will visit you more often. I'm going to talk to Harry now. I just need someone to talk to and I know I am talking to you but you can't really talk to me can you? I need an old friend. Not my new ones. They won't understand. I'll be back later on though, I'm going to bring you some flowers."

I sighed. I looked up. The weather started to go sunny again. I smiled, remembering the first day we met. He's brought me a daffodil that he had picked. It was a sweet thing. I thought he was weird but we got to know each other and he was a really nice guy. We met when we were seven. We went to the same primary school. We never really spoke to each other but he would always stare at me and then that's when we were playing outside. I was sitting on the swing they had and he had come up to me giving me the daffodil. "Well, see you later Josh."

I reluctantly left and went to the house I always went to. Hopefully they hadn't moved. If they did, then I would have to go back and I didn't want to. I know, I was probably blowing this all out of proportion. But I feel as if I need a break. I need a break from everything. I need to talk to someone who knows me well. Josh can't be here but the next person who knows me is Harry. Harry is two years older than us. He's always been like an older brother, and he was really caring. He always treated me as a sister. Sadly, their sister died at birth. I feel sorry for their parents. They've lost two children.

I finally came to their house. Or so I hoped it still was. I knocked on the door. I waited a minute or so and I was relieved when Harry did indeed open the door.

"Abi?! Is that actually you?"

"Hey Harry. I hope you don't mind me stopping by. I really need a friend right now."