Modern Magick

The Wonders of Vale: 15

I wondered if I'd heard correctly. 'One second,' I said. 'To make four or five batches?'

'I'd think so. I mean, I'm not an alchemixer, but—'

'Tylerin's Suppressants are made out of unicorn horns?'

'The very finest,' she said, with horrible cheer. 'And every bottle's steeped in unicorn hair, and, um... traces of dragon blood... I've got the literature on it somewhere.'

I interrupted her search for a no doubt horrifically informative leaflet. 'That's okay, I don't need to read about it.'

She stopped searching, and thankfully took the horn from me. 'So five batches, then?' she said.

I took a moment to grope for words, and to dispense with the raging I was sorely tempted to embark upon. 'I don't quite... I mean, how is it a suppressant if the stuff pumps us full of magickal elements?'

'I know it seems confusing, but it's really very clever,' she enthused. 'Tylerin theorised that the effects of Vale, and other potent sources of magick, are due to an imbalance between the environment and the subject. You're overwhelmed because you yourself are significantly less magickal than your surroundings. Do you see? So the suppressant actually bumps up your magick rating until it's more comparable with the environment, and then you can move through even a strong magickal surge more or less safely.'

'More or less,' I repeated.

'These are calibrated for Vale,' she said. 'We sell a range of grades adjusted for body mass and magickal talent, but unless you get a dose custom-made for yourself there'll be some variation in the results.' She brightened. 'Would you like custom doses? Our best alchemixer is in today, and she'd be delighted to assist you.'

'No!' I said, backing away. Whatever the consequences might prove to be, I couldn't bring myself to imbibe any more of Benbollen's wondrous elixirs now that I knew what went into them.

'I mean, I know it's not much different from eating a burger, when I happen to think well of cows,' I said a little later to Jay, once we stood in a mildly disconsolate knot on the pavement outside the shop. 'I still can't bring myself to drink any more of it.'

I observed what appeared to be a suppressed shudder in Jay. 'That's sort of why I don't eat burgers,' he said. 'But I take your point.'

'You... you don't?'

Jay shook his head. 'Vegetarian.'

I blinked. 'I feel I ought to have noticed that before now.'

He grinned. 'I don't really expect you to pay that much attention to my quirks.'

'This place is vile,' said Miranda with energy, erupting from the shop behind us. She had remained behind, for the pleasure of wrangling with the shop assistant. I doubted her attempts at remonstrating with them over the morality of their business had been productive of much. She stalked past us into the street, stiff with rage.

'Have they seen the error of their ways?' I called after her.

She merely bristled — visibly — and declined to answer.

Emellana smiled faintly, and said nothing.

'We'd better work fast,' said Jay. 'If we aren't using any more suppressants. Or whatever they are.'

'Right.' I forced my spinning brain to focus. 'Griffins. Torvaston. Magickal surges. Um...' I hauled Mauf out of my bag and wandered after Miranda, keeping half an eye out for... cars? No. We hadn't seen hide nor hair of a car in all of the fifth Britain. 'Mauf, have you had chance to brush up on Torvaston's magnum opus?'