Chapter 17

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Jeremiah

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Jeremiah

Family breakfast.

I used to wish for one of those. I always wanted to sit on a table one day with everyone that mattered to me, share the grace and eat, talk and laugh. I wanted that for myself, I wanted that for us, I wanted that for my family. As a boy who had spent an entire year from his childhood secretly watching this family, what it used to be at least, eat from outside the room with a huge smile on my face, it was all I ever wanted. A family of my own, no matter how small it was. Before eleven years ago, I always wondered why I never had a father to play football with, to hold hands and eat with. I used to want one so badly, even though mother always used to say she was going to let me meet my Dad when I got older.

To me, Family meals meant more than just sitting down with a couple of people that were somehow related to you and sharing a meal together, it was some sort of bonding and the first time I sat with my family for a meal, was my last. It was the day someone died. The day I lost my brother and my best friend too. The day I wished I was never born. The day I wished I hadn't wished for a family, that I hadn't wished to be a part of this family so badly. The day everything got so bad, the day I lost everything.

The table was perfectly set up. I could feel my fingers trembling slightly on my fork and knife as I buried my gaze into the food in front of me. I figured it was better if I had just acted like I was invincible, especially since Christian was only two seats beside me, plus, I figured my silence was the only way I could help him heal from what had happened earlier. My father took the gold seat at the head of the big gold table as always, and the rest of us just sat wherever we wanted. Christian obviously took his place as the first son and first child of my father by sitting right beside him by his left, Natalie right after and me right beside her, while my father's right side was occupied by Susan; my father's wife and her children, Nicholas and Kodi.

No one ever sat at the other end of the table. Christian made sure of that. According to him, no one was worthy of that seat. It didn't belong to anyone but father's fist wife, Christian's mother who had died of an overdose ten years ago. Everyone knew where he stood.

Just like me, Nick and Kodi used to be father's illegitimate children before he got married to Susan, shortly after Christian's mother's death. Everyone could understand why he was so cold to everyone and why he hated our father so much. Dad basically never gave any respect to his mother when she was alive. He was a big player in his youth. Who knows if there were other people like us out there? Father's illegitimate children. The difference between my relationship with Christian, and that of Nick and Kodi's is, one of us betrayed him and caused his mother's death, me. After Dad got married to Susan, it was like everyone forgot about Christian's mother. Susan became queen of the father's legacy.

You could hear the clicking sounds made with all our plates, spoons, and knives from right outside the room. There were about three maids surrounding the table, standing far behind us, keeping watch just in case we needed anything. I had eleven years to get used to living like this, living like I owned the world because I actually did. Every member of our family did. Thanks to my father's reputation as the owner of one of the biggest business brands in the entire country, continent, and one of the really few African business owners to gain international recognition and make it to Forbes list, our family gained a lot of respect from the outside world.

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