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Nicolette's POV
I sigh as I lay in the bed that I now hate failing asleep in. The word 'coward' was not covered by a large paining but the lingering smell of smoke was still there.

I hated this. Sitting in my room doing nothing but being trapped with my own thoughts. The outside is too dangerous. Other people are too dangerous. So I'm trapped.

There was a light knock on the door and I sensed him. The one person that I didn't want to see right now.

"Come in," I yell. The door opened slowly and Malcom came in and shut the door. "I'd rather not talk to you right now."

"I know I just came to apologize," he said. My wolf pined for him. The kiss only made her bond stronger. If things were to work out, I didn't want that as a first kiss.

"What did I tell you last night?" I ask him. He sits on the edge of the desk and crossed his legs and arms.

"No apology in the world could convince you to forgive me for the fucked up things I've done," he said. I nod and sigh.

"So why are you here to apologize?" I ask him. He sighs and rubs his hand over his face and down his neck.

"Cause I made a mistake last night. I crossed a line I shouldn't have and it caused you to panic and then I panicked then kissed you and it was just a big mistake and I'm sorry if I caused pain," he finished.

"If you caused pain? Do you not see the pain you caused me? You burned this word into my head that I had to burn it into the wall," I said knocking the painting off the wall. "The dream I had last night was terrible and scary and I'm a coward. You were right you just shined some light on what I needed to know."

"I'm sorry I really am. No one deserves to be blamed for their parent's death. The story was spread around the three communities. You parents were loved. Then their child went missing. Witches, werewolves, and vampires sent people to look for you," he told me. I smile weakly, on the verge on tears. All I've found lately is me crying. Crying like the end of the world was happening.

"I'm glad they never found me. If they found out what I am they would've instantly killed me. People are afraid of change and the truth. That's why I hid the truth from myself. I really should thank you. You made me realize how much of a failure I was to my parents," I said. He shook his head and stood up straight.

"Don't say that you are not a failure. You lived. You survived. What happened to your parents was unfortunate but think about it. They found each other. They had a wonderful child. They raised you and cared for you until it was their life or yours. They died knowing you're safe and that's all that matters. They are watching you somewhere proud of the person you've become."

"I bet I'm an ugly crier," I sniff with a small grin on my face. I wipe my tears and blow my face with my hands like it would stop it. 

"My father abused my mom mentally, emotionally, and physically. I don't want to do that to you. I'm not my father or I'm trying not to be. He trained me to be like him so I can take over the pack but I don't want to be like him," he confessed. "My mom threw him out and stood up for herself. When this month is over then you can stand up for yourself to and reject me."

"I don't want to reject you Malcom. I've never wanted to reject you. I want things to work out. I don't want to run away from my problems," I sniff. He smiles a little then I look out the window.

"We'll figure it out," he said. I nod and he slowly walks to me and wraps his arms around me. I suck in a breath at first. The burst of sparks on my body was overwhelming. His scent overflowed my senses and my wolf was happy. I wrap my hands around his torso and I sense his wolf stirring.

"You weren't wrong. I am a very difficult person to deal with," I said as he backs away.

"I know," he said. He walks out of my room and I stayed in the same position I was in when he hugged me.

I shake my head trying to comprehend what had just happened between Malcom and I. I huff and go back onto the balcony and jump off. It's so much quicker than walking out the front door.

I walk in the direction of the daycare and walk through the same crack I did last time. The snow clouds that I had formed were gone and the snow around it started to melt.

"You're really trying Lucas today aren't you," I heard Darius say. I jump from him frightening me.

"I could really care less. I was meant to be dead anyways. So if someone catches me, they can finish what was started centuries ago," I said turning around.

"Why are you here again Nicolette?" He questions me. I groan. I hate all these questions.

"I've come to watch the kids do you have a problem with it? Are you afraid I'll attack them?" I sneer. He rolls his eyes and grabs my forearm.

He was different from the first time I met him hours before. He was more assertive and demanding. I let out a warning growl as I try to pull my forearm

"I brought you back to Malcom's house for a reason," he growls back at me even louder.

"No big headed bastard has ever told me what to do," I growl. My breathing became uneven and I was furious. I felt my eyes turn a bright blue as my body was engulfed with flames. His hand burned as he let go of my hand.

"Nicole you need to stop the kids are staring," he yells. My eyes widen as I turn around and see them staring at me. I drop to my knees and the grass around me was left burnt to a crisp. My hands begin to tremble and I ran.

I stumbled forward as I lost my balance but quickly went back running. I jump into the trees and travel away from there as fast as I could.

I stand on top of a tree and sit down on a sturdy branch. I look down at my hands and watched the shake. I felt my whole body shaking.

"I'm a monster," I cry as I grab my hair near the roots and lean back. "I could've hurt them." I let out a shaky breath as I look out into the pack lands. Acres of forest land covered with homes of children and families and I can bring them to their doom in an instant.

I am a monster. All those years kept from civilization was beneficial to the whole world. I was made to be different to hide for civilization.

I'm supposed to rule this pack beside Malcom. How can I do that when I almost set children to flames because I lost my temper.

I can't answer all my damn problems with my powers but that's all I ever learned to do.  They only interaction I've made with others are my parents, Beck, his mate, and the few times I've went out into the town to buy things or steal blood.

How am I going to rule a pack without bringing it to its doom?

After this month, leave, go back to the safety of my home. This pack. These people will never know they could've had a Luna. Not like they would want me anyway.

A monstrosity.

A freak.

An abnormality.
———
Hey guys sorry for suck a late post. I got sick over the weekend and just recently felt better.

Hopefully I can get a chapter out tomorrow. If not see you Saturday or Sunday!

Follow me on Insta @eyygan

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Xoxo Emma

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