It is 4:20 and your shift just ended. You decide to go down to the castle grounds for an unspecified plot device reason. There you saw a hut that sat next to the Forbidden Forest. Your coworkers had warned you not to go near the hut because that is where Hagrid, the horrible half-giant dwelled. You decide to investigate 'cause you are naive [and I'm too lazy to write a better and more convincing reason so enjoy what definitely isn't the last plot device]
You hear loud and obnoxious crying from the other side of the door. Curious, you gently open the door...
There at a tiny table is a big-ass oaf. His tears are thudding onto the table. You quietly approach him. He is the most beautiful thing you have ever seen, like a love child of Sirius Black and Tom Riddle (The nation's greatest sex idols).
The Oaf doesn't notice you, so you take advantage. You lean close to his gorgeous face. The tears keep coming, and they look delicious, and Oh Rowling! He is just the Oxford's definition of sex appeal.
You can't resist the temptation, you lean in and plant your tongue on his wet cheek. Slurp! You start to lick up all of his tears, they are salty and juicy in flavor, and more just keep coming!
The fat oaf sex god finally notices. "Wha' ar' ya doin'?" He asks, his voice boomingly Markiplier deep. It just commanded dominance.
"Slurping your fluids," You reply, "They are tasty, I tell ya."
"Who even in Rowlin's name ar' ya?" He shoves your hand away from his hairy chest.
"Ooh, slow down, at least let me buy you dinner first. I'm (Y/N), the new herbology professor." You say flirtatiously.
"'erbology porfesso'?" He stopped resisting my licks.
"Yep, I faked my degree through some guy on Craigslist, but let me tell ya, I do got a masters in sex appeal, and you are a new type of sexy."
"I keep ma' door locked, how'd ya get in 'ere?"
"A person doesn't reveal their secrets. Now tell me why you's crying."
"Snap has bee' mean. Very mean."
You remember the greasy homeless man at the job-warming party. People called him Snape, but it never accrued to you he worked there. "What a bi-atch."
You took your final slurp and got up.
"Imma go slice this boi up." You say walking towards the door, you were slurping for so long it was dark out, "By the way, who are you mystery man?"
"Hagrid."
"Well, by Hagrid. I will find this Snape. He'll know not to mess with you when I'm done with him." You exit like a bad-ass.
YOU ARE READING
Fagrid (A Hagrid x Reader fic)
RomanceYou land yourself a job at Hogwarts looking for love. You soon find Hagrid the Horrible Half-giant and fall head over heels. In this erotic tale of two forbidden lovers there will be heartbreak, love, betrayal, death, and lust. The only question lef...
