Chapter 2 - Looking In

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Chapter 2 – Looking In

Arnav's POV

I know everyone in the family have this situation understood in their heads, that I am a workaholic. And they are right, because when I put my head to it, that's all I really think about and I do not get distracted by anything else easily. And honestly for the last couple of years in my life, there wasn't anytime for any distractions anyways.

But today again, I was distracted.I was very distracted and strange because no matter how much I immersed myself in work, my mind found any excuse that it could in that moment, to linger its thoughts back to the reason for that very distraction.

The distraction named Khushi.

It had been three days since I had spotted her on the street.

And it had been three days since I was trying to comprehend whatever this was that was happening to me.

This made no sense at all.Whatever this was, was the most nonsensical feeling ever, because I had absolutely no logic to support the emotions that I was feeling here.It had been three days in a row, that I had walked in home post 11pm, avoiding our usual family dinner time together, because I knew that my family could read me very well, specially Akash and di, it wouldn't take them more than couple of minutes to spot the distraction or restlessness that I had been feeling internally, and I knew they would question it, and I had no answer to give them, because how could I find the words to explain something to them that I couldn't really understand myself.

This was absurd.

I walked out the shower, feeling a little relaxed and I quickly changed for the night, and got into bed, with the hope that sleep would come easily, because I was feeling exhausted in my mind, it had been a long day at work, I had made sure of that.

I closed my eyes, taking a deep breathe, and there she was again, finding her way back into my thoughts, into my mind, creeping in step my step, forcing me to look within and give in to the moment.

Maybe it would be ok to actually pause to think about this, and maybe if I did actually give this moment its time, maybe this weird restlessness I was feeling within would finally fade away.

And so I found myself giving in, as my thoughts lingered back to the moment three days ago, when I saw Khushi, again.I smiled again at the fresh memory, her smile still had the power to light up a dark room.She looked almost the same as she did the last I saw of her.Kindness still ruled her heart, like it did back then, and I couldn't help but smile and feel happy about the fact that the harshness of the big bad world out there hadn't been able to change that about her.

Now that was the problem now wasn't it?

Until three days ago, she was a part of my haunting memories, but now that she had presented herself into my reality after all these years, I couldn't help but feel all those feelings that I had buried deep inside along with the past , it was like as if everything that I had felt in the past was resurfacing, again.

And I couldn't really do anything about it.

I drank a glass of water quickly, to calm my edgy nerves as I felt my mind ask me some questions on its own accord .

Its been 8 long years.

Did she even remember me??

Did she hate me for how things ended still?? Did she think about the past??

Am I part of her memories ??Or has she forgotten about my existence, over time??

And, what if she did remember me, how did she remember me, like with what emotion in her mind, with a smile or with a tinge of regret and hate?

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