Beautifully Broken

- 34 -

*ROSE'S POV*

I woke up with swollen eyes and a sore throat. I heard everything he said. I heard every bang on the door. I even heard his soft snores from behind the thin wood. My closet floor is not a comfortable as it looks.

I'll have to look into that

I slowly rise from the makeshift bed that I made out of jackets, on the floor. Instantly feeling bad, I know they are too expensive for me to sleep on.

Hell, too expensive to even be on the floor.

I walk into the bathroom purposely keeping me head down to avoid the mirror. I don't need to look at my reflection. I feel hideous, it doesn't matter how I really look. 

The hot water from the shower cascades down my back. Slowly flowing through my hair. It's everything I need at the moment.

Well, not everything

But I'm always somewhere wanting something I can't have.

My mind starts to drift to the very vivid dream I had last night. It was of me and Cole. We were dancing under the moonlight. His eyes lighting up under the bright white light as I've seen in person many times before. 

The dream was: Enchanting.

I was content in his arms. In this dream, it was the only thing I knew. There was no heartbreak. There was no pain. There was only us. I hate myself for adorning it, or anything that had to do with him. It only made me realize that I'm not mad at him. I couldn't be mad at him, it's not his fault. I was the one jumping to conclusions. It was foolish of me to think I was lovable.

He's right, love isn't real. I got a glimpse of what I thought it was and I ran with it. I'll blame it on the childhood trauma for now. 

I stop the water and start drying off. I can't seem to figure out if the water on my face are from my tears or if it's from the shower. I meet my own eyes in the mirror. Through the fog, I see a girl with worn eyes and a torn heart. At the same time, I can't remember a time when I didn't look like this.

I throw cold water on my face and slam the bathroom door.

I don't think I'll ever be happy

Maybe if I realize that now it won't be so agonizing in the long run.

***

After putting something comfortable on I look around the kitchen for something to eat before knocking on Elijah's door.

BOOM

Nevermind knocking on his door. 

I roll my eyes, continuing to be head deep in the refrigerator. Surprisingly, he doesn't say anything. I can feel his presence, nevertheless, he's quiet.

"You alright?" He asks sincerely, I chuckle softly at his attempt at being a big brother. I really appreciate it. I face him, a strawberry hanging loosely from my lips.

As soon as we locked eyes he knew. I couldn't even get a word out. Before I knew it I was engulfed in his arms. This is the brother I used to have.

"I wish I'd never met him," I sniffle, still in his embrace.

"It would break his heart if he heard you say that," Elijah retorts, I pull away slightly to look him in the eye.

"He has a heart?"