Oi Homeschooled - Fred Weasley x reader

*- 27 - I kind of think

FRED'S POV

I officially marked what I did as "the worst thing I have ever done in my life". Y/N showed me how hurt she was and as I expected, that broke my heart. Why was I such a moron?

I didn't fully realise what I had done until she showed me how hurt she was. I had given her Sedation Sweets against her will. In no world was that okay, but in that moment, I didn't look at it that way. In my mind, it was a "prank". How stupid could I possibly have been? Giving someone Puking Pastilles was a prank. Giving someone Sedation Sweets wasn't. Why didn't I realise that at the time?

I was sitting on my bed at about 4AM and rubbed my face. I hadn't gotten any sleep at all. Y/N was constantly swimming around in my brain. I had to come up with a plan. I didn't want this. I didn't want her to be angry or hurt. I wanted her to smile, I wanted to be able to hug her, I wanted to laugh with her, not at her. I wanted to be able to kiss her.

I wanted Y/N Y/L/N to be my girlfriend. I wanted her to love me the way I loved her. Why did I have to do something so stupid before I realised that? She trusted me. She gave me something so precious, so fragile, and I just broke it carelessly. What was wrong with me?

The problem was that this wasn't something I could fix by doing something nice. Like that one time I broke my mum's favourite vase, I just crafted her a new one and all was forgiven. That vase was still on our fireplace, even though it was horrendous. This was one of those problems that could only be solved by talking from the heart and I wasn't good at that.

I had to make things right, even though it would take some time. I needed her to forgive me and then, slowly but surely I needed her to like me again. I needed her. I guess I could forget that Butterbeer date next Saturday. She could've been my girlfriend from that day on, but now she wouldn't be.

"Fred, can you please just go to sleep?" George murmured half asleep.

"Sorry", I whispered and laid back down. This was going to be a long night.

YOUR POV

Talking to the girls had really helped. It put everything in perspective, but made me look more positive to the future. I had said to Fred what I needed to get off my chest and now it was his turn. I needed to decide for myself what I would do when that time would come. The way Fred looked yesterday, I knew he'd try to make things right and I would forgive him, because he was still my friend, but did I still want him to be more? Of course I still liked him, but was that enough? Was it enough to risk getting hurt again?

I had been so angry when I spoke to him, but I had calmed down now. Fred didn't drug me, I shouldn't make it that dramatic. He tested out one of his sweets inventions on me without permission. That was absolutely not okay, but it was nothing like being drugged, especially because he had immediately taken me to Madame Pomfrey when it had gotten out of hand. I had heard about a girl in my street getting drugged and assaulted a couple years ago. What Fred did wasn't nearly as bad as a situation like that, not even close.

Which is why I wasn't really angry at him for giving me that cake anymore, he never meant any harm. I was angry, an even more sad, because he had broken a promise. I had trusted him and he had broken that trust.

Those were problems for another time, though.

I was surprised at how fast the time was going, though. It was already March, meaning that there were only four months of school left before the summer holidays. I wasn't looking forward to those holidays, though. I knew the school had been looking for family to take me in during those two months, but they wouldn't find any. I never knew my mum's side of the family because she was originally from Belgium and moved to Britain to go to Hogwarts. We never went to visit that side of the family. I had met my grandparents twice though, but my grandfather passed away when I was very young and my grandmother had dementia. And as for my dad ... well, I never knew him so definitely not his family. That meant that during the summer holidays, I'd have to go to an orphanage and that's not my description of a holiday. Maybe I could ask to stay in Hogwarts, but I doubted it.