XVIII. Doubts

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The house was empty, all the lights were off and the only thing that illuminated Gun's feeble figure was the light coming from the full moon seeping through his thin curtains. He laid cold, curled up on his bed inside his room and eventually falling asleep contemplating about his own existence.

Gun woke up the next day feeling empty, he had been feeling so empty these past couple of weeks that its starting to be normal. Without much thought, his feet dragged him across the room, to the shower, and to his dresser, to their empty hallway, and outside their home.

"Good morning P'Gun!" Mark beamed from where he was standing next to his car, hands on the pocket, lips stretched into a wide smile.

Gun didn't notice him so he was taken aback but still managed to force a smile before nodding. "Good morning. Why are you here N'Mark? Kris is not here."

"I'm here to pick you up." Mark replied easily, right hand slipping out of his pocket and scratching the back of his head.

Gun blinked a few times as he tried to process what the younger boy had just said. "What? Why?" He asked.

"Do I really need to tell you?" Mark replied raising his left eyebrow. He sighed when Gun looked at him with the same confused look. "Because I like you a lot. And don't complain because you don't have to do anything but to sit and enjoy my company, okay?" Mark grabbed Gun's left hand and dragged him to his car, gesturing for him to enter after opening the door. Gun just followed him without much talking.

"Have you eaten yet?" Mark asked as he fastened his seatbelt.

Gun shook his head before leaning on the window. "I'm not hungry."

"Again? Come on Phi don't be like that. Don't make me worry about you," Mark breathed out, eyes focusing on the road.

"I'm sorry," his answer was automatic, like it was now the only word that comes out of his mouth that he was sure of.

"Lets just grab some coffee and donuts at least. Will you eat with me?" Mark glanced at him with hopeful eyes which was always enough to convince him.

Once again, the two boys ate in silence. Gun was not his usual self and Mark can clearly see right through his eyes. He doesn't smile as often as he usually does, he wasn't as talkative as before, and he barely even touch his foods which used to be so unacceptable for his Phi. Its as if he's becoming foreign to Mark, and even to himself.

Mark drove to the hospital after they finished eating, there he stayed with Gun for a couple of hours before excusing himself to go to school. Of course Gun was worried why Mark would ditch his first class but the boy told him that he had finished his tasks ahead of time so he doesn't have to attend the next meetings. Gun seems to believe him but the truth was, he really ditched his first class just to be with Gun and if he didn't just want his Phi to be worried about him, he had ditched his classes altogether.

Physically, Mark was inside the classroom, but mentally, he was at the hospital with Gun. Its like Mark was there, but he wasn't there at the same time. It was confusing, its like every piece of him craved to be with Gun.

Mark was too occupied with the brown haired boy that only when the classes were over did he noticed that Kris wasn't around. He got inside his car and immediately called his friend when he realized that just like Gun, Kris might also be hurting.

"Eyyy Mark," Kris sounded pissed drunk as he shouted from the other line as soon as it got through.

"Where are you?" Mark asked somewhat disappointed that Kris didn't told him about his drinking session, but a bit guilty that he had totally forgotten about his bestfriend.

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