44. Home Sweet Home

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The flight home wasn't terrible, and I made it back. I couldn't help but listen to music that made me feel even worse about myself. I wasn't sure how I felt being back in Ohio. The only thing I have here is my mom and I never wanted to see her as badly as I do now. She's the only one that can calm me down and make me feel better. I've done some terrible things and I don't want to continue beating myself up about it.

Knowing she would be at work, I took an Uber straight there. I just needed her more than anything. I didn't want to wait until the next morning, either. I miss her scent and her beautiful smile. I miss the ridiculous cute things she'd say to make me feel better or the trips we'd make to get ice cream in the middle of the night.

I bit down on my lip as I walked through the confusing hospital. I've been here so many times and still find myself getting lost every time. I glanced at the time and it was eleven on the dot. It's late, but my mom usually works overnight. I hope she's not busy.

When I finally made it to her floor, a familiar face noticed me first. "Riley? Oh my God! It's been so long." Lisa, my mom's friend, rose from sitting behind the desk as soon as you got off the elevator. She was dressed in her light purple scrubs with a welcoming smile on her face. "When did you get back?"

I forced a smile. "A few minutes ago. My mom doesn't know. I was hoping to surprise her."

She squealed, fingering through her pixie-cut blonde hair. "She's going to be so excited. She never stops talking about you. By the way, how was Florida?"

I sighed, not really wanting to talk about it right now. "Florida is beautiful. It was definitely a learning experience."

"I'm calling your mom down here now, sweetheart."

I nodded and casually waited. I picked at my nails and glanced around the third floor of the hospital. I remember when I was a kid, I'd have to sit here and wait for my mom to get off. It was probably the most boring thing I've ever done in my life, but it was just us. Most of my childhood was spent in this damn hospital.

"It better be a good reason you made me wa—" My mom stopped talking when she saw me standing in the middle of the hallway with a shit ton of bags, "Is today Wednesday? Riley?"

I immediately smiled and paced towards my mom for a hug. Once my arms swung around her body, I breathed out in relief. I didn't realize how much I missed her until I actually saw her face. She smelled like vanilla mixed with cucumbers or something,which made me think of Joey. He lives on the cucumber Dove soap.

When she pulled away, she met my eyes, "I thought I still had two days! I should've been home. Oh my God, why are you back so early?" I took a glance at her face and studied her. She had medium length wavy brown hair, almost the same color as mine, but a tad darker. She also dressed in lavender colored scrubs, with the necklace I bought her last year for her birthday.

She stood tall over me. "I-I just...missed you. I wanted to come back home." I nodded rapidly until I started to cry. I dropped my face towards the ground, feeling my body go limp. I quietly sobbed, trying not to cause a scene at her work. It's bad enough Lisa won't stop looking over.

My mom breathed out and lifted my head back up. "Why are you crying if you missed me?" She latched her manicured hand onto my shoulder, "Come on baby." I followed behind her as we walked into a vacant room. She waited a few seconds before speaking and pushed my hair towards my back.

Her breath hitched. "Talk to me. What's wrong with you?"

Her sweet voice rang in my ears. I broke down again, mad I brought this to her job. I wanted to surprise her and just give her a hug until we got home. I didn't want to worry her. I've been so emotional lately and this just breaks me. I told my mom about Sam's rule again and how I got too cozy with her brother. I told her that I fell for someone that didn't want me because he thinks he doesn't deserve me. He thinks I'm too good for him, but I'm not. My mom listened with such a sad, teary eyed look on her face. I then broke down even more, telling her about how badly I hurt Sam.

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