Off Limits

46. 'F' Bomb

JOEY 
COLLINS

It's been four days. A complete ninety-six hours, and 345,600 seconds since I've seen Riley. I haven't stopped thinking about her or her face when I rejected her. It's like she permanently engraved herself in my mind because I can't stop it. I miss the look she gave me, her scent, and her smile. Not to mention, the letter. She wrote a fucking goodbye letter and it honestly put me in a weird place. I've been isolating myself for a few days and I can't bring myself to throw this letter away. I made her cry. I made her hurt. I can't even bring myself to text her, I can't do that. She said she'll never forgive me and now she's gone out of my life. I never once felt this way, ever. I've never been stuck on a damn girl in my life. There's something about her that draws me in every time. I should've just let Chris pursue her because he was a more decent guy than I can ever be.

Fuck! See, I can't stop myself from falling deep into this trap I put myself in. Why did Sam even have to invite her? I'm usually good with hiding what I felt and going on about my day, but I can't.

Sam still hasn't talked to me. We left the beach house the next day after the house damn near fell apart. When Sam read the letter Riley wrote for her, she went insane. I mean, the crying and a different side of her came out. I felt so fucking bad and I can't do shit about it.

Now, Dylan and I are home in the condo we share. I haven't really spoken to him about anything going on but he's been occupied himself. I didn't realize how many women we ran through this house until I witnessed him do it every night since. I wish I could have brought her back to my place and have her soak her scent into my sheets. Call me soft, but I can't sleep with her not next to me.

I got so used to her making my arm go numb untill it didn't even bother me anymore. Whenever it falls asleep, I let it go.

I wonder if she's doing the same thing I'm doing because it's fucking miserable? I let out a much needed yawn and cursed under my breath. Something has to give. I can't be sitting in bed for four days without doing shit. I can't let her take over my fucking mind and I just let it happen.

I quickly picked up my phone and started scrolling down my feed:

Me: Where you at?

She almost replied instantly:

Alayna: Home. What do you have in mind, handsome ;)

Me: I'll be over in an hour.

Alayna: You know where the spare key is! See you soon xoxo.

I rolled my eyes and dragged myself to take a hot shower.

~~

When I pulled into the driveway to Alayna's apartment, I took a deep breath and forced myself out of the car. The chilly night air felt good against my skin as I slowly stepped into her apartment. Alayna and I have been fuck buddies for as long as I can remember, but only when I'm desperate. She's in love with me, but I still let it happen.

I'm the definition of a real asshole.

I lifted up the welcome mat and grabbed the silver key on the ground. I unlocked her door and locked it behind me as I trailed through her apartment to her bedroom. I feel like a fucking zombie. I've been floating through life and I hate it. When I cut the corner, Alayna was just getting out of the shower with a silky black robe on that showed her matching red bra and panties.

For once, I felt nothing when I saw the half-naked women in front of me, but I fought past it.

A smirk formed on her face as I forced myself to her lips. I aggressively pulled her into a kiss and gripped the back of her jet black hair. I caught her off guard because she tried situating herself into the kiss. "You're a bit eager."

I ignored her and pushed her back onto her leopard print bed spread. I fell into her legs as she wrapped them around me. I still didn't feel shit. For Riley, or before Riley, I got hard almost instantly.

Our lips locked as I quickly tried to unclasp her bra, but it wouldn't come the fuck off. I tugged at the straps until I just ripped it off. She quickly pulled away from the kiss and arched her brow, "That was expensive and my favorite."

I cleared my throat. "I'll give you the money for it."

I roughly slammed my lips onto hers as she took control and forced herself on top of me. I quickly went along with it, hoping it would turn me on. I never minded a female taking all of the control. I dug my face into her chest and took her breasts in both hands as she pushed her head back exposing the tattoos that inked her body.

Once the kissing got intense, Alayna peeled her body off mine and started rubbing me through my Adidas sweats. I breathed out and watched her bring her focus to me. I tried clearing my mind while she managed to yank both my sweats and boxers down. She exposed my length to her and replaced her hands with her mouth.

Nothing.

I sighed and waited a second longer, feeling myself trying to get hard. "Joey, baby, what's going on?" She stopped and tried using her hand again, noticing I couldn't get erect.

I clenched my jaw and pushed her hand away from me. I quickly adjusted my pants and paced out of her room. "Joey? What the fuck? Get back in bed with me." She latched her hand around my wrist as I jerked away.

Annoyed, I answered, "Get off me."

"What's wrong with you?"

I swallowed the lump in my throat and headed right the fuck back out of her apartment. Why the fuck didn't I get hard? That's NEVER happened to me. I slammed my body back in my car and gripped onto the steering wheel. Fucking Alayna stood at her door, covering herself with her robe. "What about my bra?"

I aggressively backed out of the parking spot and back to my apartment. When I took the elevator to the top floor, Dylan had two women I've never seen before top-less and waiting, "Bro, I'm happy you came back. I figured you need to blow some steam."

I froze in place, tired as hell with an attitude. "No."

He rose from his sitting position and adjusted his belt. "Come on, bro. You've been cooped up in your room for days. Jessica, on the other hand, is looking for a good time."

"I don't give a fuck."

He raised his voice, "What the fuck is wrong with you?"

"You! All you do is bring all these women in the house, and I can never fucking sleep. Jill, Jessica, whatever the hell your name is, go home and take your friend with you."