Breathe With Me (One, Two, Three)

Chapter 19: When I Close My Eyes

"You left your gun in the kitchen by the way," Percy said around a mouthful of Lucky Charms.

Dean nearly choked on his own food, wheezing slightly as he spoke, "W-What?"

"I put it in your room," The man continued, picking out the marshmallows separately and eating them. "What if Frank saw it? He's an impressionable young man."

"He's a fish," The elder Winchester said but his heart wasn't in it. Percy found his gun just lying around. Why wasn't he saying anything about it?

"Same thing." Percy kept pushing around his cereal, search for more of the marshmallows. He glanced at his best friend and did a doubletake at his face, "What? The fuck's wrong with you?"

Dean pointed at his roommate with his spoon, "You're not going to ask why I have a gun?"

The man made a small noise like he remembered something and stood up, "Wait here." He walked off to his room, seeming to rummage for something, before coming back. He tossed something lightly on the coffee table, flopping back down on his spot on the couch. He nodded at the item when Dean only stared, picking up his cereal bowl once more.

The Winchester leaned forward, picking it up. In his hands was a bronze dagger, the blade sharpened to a deadly point. He held it carefully, testing its weight, before looking at his best friend, "Why do you have this?"

"I'm a beautiful man, Winnie," Percy said dramatically, nearly upending his bowl as he gestured with his spoon. "I have to defend myself somehow."

"Most would go with pepper spray," Dean responded, raising an eyebrow as he held the weapon out to his friend.

The man grabbed the dagger, twirling it in his hand for a moment before setting it on the arm of the couch, "I will remember that, use it for next time."

"What next time? What happened last time?"

Percy shrugged, "Don't worry about it."

"You saying that doesn't make me worry any less, you know."

Before the man could respond, the front door opened and Sam walked in, his satchel slung over his shoulder. "Man, first day at the library was- why is there a dagger on the couch?"

The two waiters looked at the knife and then looked at each other. "Well, there goes my plan of stabbing you," Percy grumbled, fighting a laugh at the youngest Winchester's alarmed expression.

Dean sighed, "Looks like it's back to the drawing board for us."

"You both are assholes," Sam decided, making his way over to the kitchen. "Hi, Frank. Anyways, my day at work was fine, thanks for asking."

"Did you get fired already?" Percy asked, standing up to take his bowl to sink. He made a face when Dean held out his own bowl but took it anyways with him.

Sam gave the black-haired man an unimpressed look, "No, I didn't. I'm only doing part time to start since I'll also be taking my classes."

The man nodded, "Right, seems like a good plan." He placed the dishes in the sink, turning on the tap to fill the two bowls with water. He turned it off before looking at Sam, "What time do you go in tomorrow?"

"Nine," The youngest Winchester answered as he took out ingredients to prepare himself a salad. "I get off five."

"I can drive you to work if you want," Percy offered, opening the pantry for more food since he was hungry. Finding nothing worth eating, he went to the fridge to grab beer for himself and Dean.

Sam grinned, "That'd be awesome. Hey, hand me a water?" He quickly raised his hands to catch the water bottle the other threw at him. "Thanks."

The black-haired man opened both bottles in his hands, nodding, "Sure. Anyways, since you work there and all, I'm going to need a few books."

"Alright, just text me a list." After mixing the ranch and salad toppings with the leaves, he plated the salad. "We watching a movie today?"

"Nah, we're watching Doctor Who."

"Oo, nice. Which doctor?"

"Capaldi. He's Dean's favorite. We're watching The Zygon Inversion."

Sam nodded, "That sounds familiar. I think Dean looked it up a few times on my computer."

Percy grinned widely, "It's, arguably, the best speech made by the Doctor. Anyways, come on or we'll watch it without you."

The two made their way to the living room, Percy flopping back down at his spot next to Dean at the far end of the couch near the door, and Sam sitting closest to the kitchen. Dean was clearly ready as he hit play on the remote, the episode starting.

Soon, it came to the part all three were anticipating- the Doctor's speech that brought chills to many people.

"Because it's not a game, Kate. This is a scale model of war. Every war ever fought, right there in front of you. Because it's always the same. When you fire that first shot, no matter how right you feel, you have no idea who's going to die! You don't know whose children are going to scream and burn! How many hearts will be broken! How many lives shattered! How much blood will spill until everybody does what they were always going to have to do from the very beginning. Sit down and talk!"

Percy's eyes were wide as his attention was fixed on the screen. That part, That very moment- it was like everything he ever felt was spoken by the Doctor. It was what he wanted everyone to know because war was pointless. It hurt people, so many people, when, in the end, all anyone ever needed to do was sit and talk their problems out.

Dean glanced at his best friend, seeing the transfixed expression on his face mixed with sadness and regret. He wanted to ask, he really did, but he knew now wasn't the time. He would have to ask when they were alone where no one would overhear. He owed Percy that much.

"I don't understand? Are you kidding? Me? Of course I understand. I mean, do you call this a war? This funny little thing? This is not a war! I fought in a bigger war than you will ever know. I did worse things than you could ever imagine. And when I close my eyes I hear more screams than anyone could ever be able to count! And do you know what you do with all that pain? Shall I tell you where you put it? You hold it tight till it burns your hand, and you say this. No one else will ever have to live like this. No one else will have to feel this pain. Not on my watch!"

Percy mouthed the last four words with the Doctor, his fingers wrapped around the beer bottle, his grip hard enough that it felt like the bottle could shatter any moment. When the scene was de-escalating, he slowly loosened his hold on the bottle until it rested gently in his hands.

Sam, without a comment, grabbed it, setting it quietly on the coffee table. He seemed to pick up on the black-haired man's weird mood, understanding that the episode seemed to mean something to him they didn't quite know. "I think it's time we went to bed. It's getting late."

"Right," Dean stood up, stretching. "We have to be in at the diner at ten."

Percy shook his head before standing as well, grinning at Sam, "Night, Samantha."

The youngest Winchester pointed at him, "Great, now I have nightmares."

"Rude," He swiped his beer bottle up again, chugging the rest and throwing it in the trash. "Night, boys. Don't look out the window tonight."

"Why the fuck would you say that?" Both brothers demanded and was only answered with Percy's cackles.

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Video: The Doctor's Speech | The Zygon Inversion | Doctor Who