Love and Other Diseases (bxb)

Chapter Twenty-Three

It was after the cookies were in the oven (ten more minutes until we could leave!) and Blake was in the bathroom, that things finally got real.

Alana leaned in and glared, the first time she hadn't acted all polite and kind and above-it-all. "I know why you're such an asshole to me," she snapped.

"Because you're trying to steal my man?" I questioned.

She rolled her eyes. "No."

Huh, maybe I was a sexist.

"Because I will steal your man," Alana growled.

Oh good, I wasn't sexist. Alana was just a cliché.

"You do realize that your behavior kind of ruins the reputation of women everywhere, right?" I asked. "It's kind of an embarrassment."

Alana rolled her eyes. "I don't care about all women and the weird things you say. I care about the fact that when Blake dumped me he told me that he liked someone else. And that someone was you. You literally destroyed—"

"Right," I agreed. "That was harsh of him. So why aren't you mad at him? Or why don't you choose to date someone who's actually going to choose you first and treat you right? You're acting like how women act in movies that men write."

Alana faltered a little. Then she resumed track. "I would usually agree." Well, at least that was something. "But this time isn't the case. Blake doesn't actually like you, he's just confused because you've spent this whole time acting like he's the worst, and he's finally won you over. He probably feels like you're more important than—"

"Are the cookies done yet?" Blake asked, because Blake was a magician who totally teleported to and from that bathroom.

"Were you in the bathroom for ten minutes?" I asked with some snark, angry because Blake didn't believe me and my friends didn't believe me and Alana was actually evil. "No? Then they aren't done."

Usually I was rude, but apparently that was more rude than usual. Blake blinked. "Are you okay?"

"Dandy," I sighed. "Your friend is being a lovely host."

Blake looked at me like I was being weird, but didn't care too much. "Okay, well let's like watch TV or something while we wait."

I tossed myself in an armchair and gave Oblivious and his girlfriend the couch. Blake gave me another weird look but I stared at the TV and ignored him. He was annoying.

After awkward TV watching and cookies that tasted like betrayal and gross inside jokes between Blake and his ex, I finally escaped.

"So," Blake said after we'd gotten into the car. "Maybe that was a really bad idea."

"That sucked."

"Drive slow," Blake said. "We need to talk."

It was constant emotional vulnerability with this guy.

"She just told me she wants to get back together with you," I ratted her out. I saw no reason not to. "Like I thought. So actually, I'm not sexist or annoying."

"Really?!" Blake made a face. "You got lucky."

"I could tell," I denied. "The way she looks at you. The way she flaunted weird inside jokes from your past. She laughs at your jokes and you're rarely funny. She—"

"Jake!" Blake protested. "I'm hilarious, dude, first of all, so shut up. But... yeah. Yeah, I get what you're saying. I'm sorry, man, I didn't know. Sorry for pushing it. I knew Alana liked me, but we had a talk yesterday about how we were gonna stay friends and stuff."

I found myself wanting to be bitter, but unable to be. Blake saw the best in his friend and didn't assume that she had manipulative intentions. There really was nothing wrong with that.

I turned to him, keeping an eye on the road. "You guys were friends though, weren't you? You really gelled."

Blake fidgeted awkwardly. "I don't like the way you sound, dude. Yeah, we knew each other pretty well. But we can bake cookies together and shit, Jake. We have time."

For whatever reason, Blake's promise to bake cookies together and shit was reassuring. "I felt like you obviously should be with her," I admitted, because this was emotional vulnerability time. "Because of all your jokes and stuff."

Blake smacked my arm and then shook his hand in pain, which was pretty flattering. "Idiot. We have jokes, maybe."

We both silently absorbed the fact that we had no jokes.

"Well, we don't have jokes because of your deadpan personality," Blake said, but there was an upturn to his mouth and his eyes were bright, so maybe he wasn't head over ugly sneakers for Stupid Alana.

"I am secretly very funny," I protested. "Ben laughs at me all the time. I mean with me. Of course."

Blake laughed just as we pulled into his driveway. I turned to him and kissed him. I kissed him until he was grinning, and then I pressed kisses up his neck so that his grin turned to a gasp.

We pulled away and I kept my hand in his hair, ready to kiss him again at any moment. His smile faded into an expression that was a lot more serious, which was maybe what spurred me to say what I said next.

"It scared me," I admitted. "The thought of you leaving me and going back to Stupid Alana. I hated thinking that it could happen. I don't really know when it happened, or how, but I really like you Blake the snake."

Blake's hand reached up to grab my forearm and his thumb stroked the skin there, giving me goosebumps. He turned his head a little and kissed the inside of my wrist. "I would never leave you, Jake the unfathomably rude asshole."

I laughed and he kissed me. I soaked in the terrible relief I felt at just hearing the words leave his mouth. I was attached to him so much that I would push around timid gay kids to take him to prom, or put up with vivacious exes so that he wouldn't be grumpy.

"I'm starting to worry that there's nothing I won't do for you," I snorted.

Blake rolled his eyes. "I can reassure you. Hey Jake, want to work on our project? It's an essay and we have two days left to do it and we've accomplished nothing."

"What fucking project?" I blurted, utterly confused.

Blake looked deadpan. "Yeah, that's what I thought. You're such a jock. I actually hate you. Not enough to go back to my ex, but definitely enough to take the rest of your leftover cookies."

Because Blake the mistake was total evil and vile, he grabbed the Tupperware container of cookies that was in my backseat and waved it in my face. I kissed him again, and we got caught up in each other.

I wanted to lock the doors and talk to him until it was midnight and my mom was calling me to make sure I wasn't murdered. I wanted to hear every dumb thing his dumb mouth could say, and I wanted to make fun of him until he hit my arm like he had before. I wanted to hear him insult me and ask about my friends. I wanted to talk about his friends, and I hated learning things about people.

Blake pulled away, eyelashes lowered and lips red from kissing. "I should go."

Please don't.

"Yeah," I gasped. "Meet you at the mailbox tomorrow?"

He smiled. I had never believed that hearts could quicken, or skip a beat, or any of that gooey romantic garbage, but when Blake smiled my heart did all of those things. Hell, when Blake Beckson smiled my heart danced the fucking foxtrot.

"Yeah."

Fuck. Fuck. When did this happen? I was left waiting until he got inside safe, and then waved at his mom through the window. I was obsessed.

I went to bed that night, heart still beating fast.