Companionate (18+) | Completed ✔️

Chapter 28: "Let me be your anchor."

"Your father and I would love it if you would join us for dinner next week."

My heart pounded hearing the words flow out of her mouth. My hands curled into a tight fist, my eyes closed as I tried to contain my feelings. I was never disrespectful to this woman but the way I was feeling right now was too much to contain. "Excuse me?!?!"

"Monroe. You are still my daughter and I would appreciate if we could talk about this like adults. I know in the past -" I felt my anger levels rising as she brought up the past, which was never pretty, never nice, never even okay. The past with Yvette Harris was dark and there was never a light at the end of the tunnel. "In the past, what Yvette? In the past, I didn't take care of you Monroe. In the past, I didn't try and show you love Monroe. I'm sorry for the past Monroe!!!"

My voice began to crack as my teeth clenched together repeating the words I would never hear. I closed my eyes tightly forcing the unshed tears away, I had already vowed to myself to never cry again for this woman, and that man I call my father. I vowed to myself and my kind heart that I would never shed any more tears over them because as much as their names are on my birth certificate... They are not my parents.

I had a parent, I had a carer, I had a guardian and I had a confidant. Her name is Clarise and she was the most wonderful mother figure that anyone would ever be graced with and she was my mother. I halted the rest of the poisonous words wanting to spill from my lips before they exploded out of me in the worst of ways.

"Monroe we want you to -" I shook my head stopping her words from vibrating through my ears. She wasn't in the position to demand anything from me. "No. You don't get to do that. You don't get to want anything from me -" I felt my chest tighten, I rubbed my chest feeling the panic attack minutes away from rippling out of me in violent waves. I sighed taking one last breath. "Why did you call Yvette?"

I heard her sigh before she spoke. "I know I wasn't the best mother to you." She was falling from her pedestal of greatness and I couldn't help but feel the blood we shared causing this tiny aching sensation in my chest for her. "Monroe you always deserved more than what I could give you."

She was falling from grace and the aching feeling in my heart was spreading to my lungs. "I thought that giving you every materialistic thing would make up for the things I couldn't. I didn't have any motherly instincts, most women had it naturally but for me I never did. I tried, I tried to love you in the way that you deserved but I didn't know how." Her voice began to crack and the sound was excruciating.

"I know it's probably too late to ask for your forgiveness and it would be selfish of me to even think that I could -" My heart was aching and my lungs felt like they had a huge weight pushing down on them suffocating me in her words. I rubbed my chest again, the tears streaming down my face and my hand drew around my mouth as I felt all of the years of her verbal abuse hit me all at once. "- but I am asking for a chance."

I felt my knees begin to buckle beneath me as the pain spread through my body hearing her deafening request but before my body completely lowered I felt his arms cradle me. He held me as I held on for dear life, she was the only other person that could trigger my mind, body, heart and soul into this depth of pain. "I got you baby, I got you. Let me be your anchor."

He whispered in my ear holding me up like he always did. The goosebumps rose on my skin, the colour was coming back into my world and the deeply sad feelings that she bestowed upon me started to fade away. He allowed us to fall to the ground but in the safety of his arms, he cradled my shaking body as I curled my face into his neck.

He rocked me gently until I found my breathing and my heartrate stabilised, I took in his calming scent and fed off of his serene aura. "I got you. I will always be by your side, promise." He whispered into me, his words made everything easier, everything calmer and everything okay. I put the phone back to my ear hearing my parents muffled voices.