16. Open when

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Taehyung sat on Laurance's bed, legs criss crossed and the Open When ziplock in hand.

He smiled looking at it and gently touched Jungkook's beautiful hand writing with the palm of his hand.

Taehyung has always loved his handwriting. Back in highschool, both of them made the same notes but then exchanged them to study because Taehyung could memorize stuff ten times easier if it was in jungkook's handwriting.

It was art, and it came so easily to jungkook. He even used to paint a lot till high school.

Taehyung has always wondered why he suddenly got so adamant in enrolling for buisiness school even though he was pretty sure he wanted to learn art. Taehyung accepted his decision anyhow without questioning much, given the fact that it did turn out to be a good idea.

He opened the zip trying to be as gentle as possible. As much as he was thankful to Koo for making something so thoughtful because the other literally depends on his best friend and his best friend knows it, he really hates how this came into use right on the day it was given to him.

He knows he is overreacting a bit because nobody knows jungkook better than him and his face told how shocked he was. And something like this has always triggered jungkook. On other thoughts, he was expecting an even wierder reaction from the other considering all the previous times that happened.

But he isn't the one to be blamed for being a little hurt too. He knows jungkook is gonna apologize one million times. The 50+ voice notes that he recieved ever since he left and is not going to hear, he already knows what they contain.
The talk they had, should've been before the date. He just dropped the bomb on Jungkook's head and the other panicked.

And jungkook and panic have never been a good duo.

He really doesn't want the other to apologize again. Lately that's all he's been doing. Even when he wasn't at fault at all. Like the Daisy case, she was a bitch, he broke it off with her, and still begged for forgiveness even though taehyung knew better why he didn't say anything.
Or the argument last Saturday where he just gave his opinion and then apologized for having different views than Taehyung's.

Taehyung shook his head and emptied the brown envelopes of the ziplock on the bed.
These were more than he thought they were.

Taehyung quickly read on top of all the envelopes and chose two of them in beautiful cursive saying-
When you can't sleep.
And
When you feel alone.

He put all the others back in the ziplock and gently placed it back in the big inside pocket of his long Fendi overcoat.

He set aside the when you can't sleep for later, when he would actually want to sleep and gently took the when you feel alone in his hand.

He opened the flap and took out the baby pink paper inside of it so slow and soft that even the letter wouldn't come to know if it was read.

He opened the letter and smiled at the handwriting, already feeling as if he wasn't alone anymore. As if it was jungkook who was sleeping on the couch outside.

Hello Tae-ssi,

If you're reading this letter, that means I've already failed as a best friend.

Taehyung shook his head vigorously already regretting opening this letter and contemplated if he should read it further or put it back. Just then, the next sentence caught his attention.

If I know you at all, now you must be already regretting opening this letter and contemplating if you should read it further or put it back.

Taehyung bit his lower lip and smiled softly.

You remember John Stovie? The biker guy with wierd mustache from high school? He once told me that he bullied you because he envied you for being so smart that all the teachers were obsessed with you, so handsome that all the girls swooned over you, so soft spoken that all the guys liked you too.
And he bullied me because how dare I be the only person you ever laugh, talk, hangout and have fun with.

If I sit down and make a list of the proudest moments of my life this one will definitely make to the top 10 of my list.

I've always had a lot of friends and sometimes hate calling you that too. Because you're not a friend to me, best friend also doesn't seem to do justice enough. If I had to give your connection to me a name, I'd call it soulmate.

Taehyung's eyes became blurry but slowly the vision returned as warm falls of sentiments trickeled down his cheeks.

Yep, that's what you are.
I never want to be in a relationship is because, like I said, until you're around me, there's never going to be anyone who makes me feel more special than you already do.

You've laughed with me, laughed at me. Cried with me, cried for me. You've gotten beaten up by bullies trying to protect my sorry ass even when you were like half my size. You're so selfless, it's gross.

It hurts me that I'm not as expressive as I'd like to be. I'd like to pamper you more, take care of you more, maybe, clean more.
Okay, not the last one, but the rest is true.

So if you really think that you're alone just because my useless ass couldn't make you feel any different, know that, you're the most important.. Actually, scratch that... You're the only important person in my life..

Call me back home if I'm out somewhere. Or come back home if you are. Although there's less than 1 in 1000 chance of the latter happening.
I'll come running back. Unless I'm dead. Whoa! Then this'll be some real P.S I love you shit! Ooh I'd love to be Gerard butler! I mean have you seen his bod??!

I'm sorry, I should wrap up. Go eat some chocolate and know that no matter whatever we're fighting about, you're the sun of life. And the son of a bitch. How poetic of me? *chef's kiss*

P.S- I love you.

(- Koo, the cutie)


Taehyung, by now, was having fits of laughter and sobs hysterically.

He was confused by himself because here he was, sitting on somebody else's bed with a previously nameless, but now as clear as distilled water, undying urge that scared the bajesus out of him.

The familiar urge he's had for years but now knows it's name and address.

An urge to kiss his best friend.

Only this time this urge whispered something in his ear that shook his entire world. Decolonized the complete residents of concepts he had about himself and the other boy and set up a new foundation that terrified him to the marrow of his bones.

It said-

"I am the urge to kiss the love your life! "

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Finally something to look forward to

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Bye bye 👋

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