Snow In Hell (Alastor x Fem!Reader)

Distraction

Ok soooo I think I have this slightly under control right now. I still don't know 100% on why Vox kidnapped me, but I do know he likes someone with a sense of humor. So I've been using that to my advantage.

And so for the past 20 minutes I've been distracting him. Damian is sulking in a corner waiting for whatever Vox has in-store for me to start. And Velvet has been on her phone this whole time.

Valentino hasn't returned yet so that's good I think. I bring back my attention to a laughing Vox after I told him a joke about Blitzo.

"Hehehe my, your boss must be one hell of an idiot to do that!"

I chuckled with him trying to keep the act and nodded. Then a brilliant idea popped in my head, I quickly went through my pockets until I finally found what I was looking for.

Blitzo's phone!!!!!

I laughed as I pulled it out and pointed at it while still looking at Vox. He's still chuckling as he gives a slight confused look at the phone.

"Now what's that?" He asked.

"A phone, thought that was obvious." I grinned at him ready to show him the funniest shit he's ever going to hear.

"Yes it is a phone, but who's is it and what do you plan to do with said phone?"

"Well it's my bosses phone, and there might be a contact in here that will give you quiet the show. If you're brave enough to hear it." I taunt him while waving the phone in front of me.

"Honey we're in hell, I've heard some stuff, it can't be that bad." I cringed a little when he called me honey but shook it off.

"Oh just you wait." I open the phone and looked through the contacts.....ahhhh found it.

I found the contact that was named Creepy Mouth (aka one night stand bird dick). Great choice of words Blitzo, I couldn't have done better.

I clicked the call button and shushed Vox as I leaned the phone closer into a hole I made in my ice cocoon so me and Vox can talk without him killing me.

Stolas finally answers the phone. "My my my Blitzy you never call me! What's the special occasion, or did you just miss me and my body that badly? Then again how can I blame you?"

I quietly giggled and answered, "Sorry Stolas you see Blitzo has been very busy lately but he couldn't stop talking about you so I took it upon myself to call you and to deliver a message."

"Oh (Y/N) it's good to hear from you too, now what is it that Blitzy wanted to say?"

I give Vox a smirk with a raised eyebrow and looked down at the phone again.

"Well he said that he missed your big bird cock and that he couldn't stop thinking about it. He would non stop jack off to you before he sleeps and call for his bird daddy to choke him."

Vox gives me a (wtf) face and I whispered to him, "That was nothing compared to whatever Stolas has to say."

Our attention was brought back to the phone and Stolas was excited, here it comes.

"Well (Y/N) can you tell Blitzy that I want to choke on that red ████ of his █████ his s████ and lick all of his ███ before taking out his ████ and ████ with more teeth until he's screaming ████████████████ like a fucking baby!"

I don't look at Vox and just smile at the phone. "Will do Stolas oh and tell Octavia I said hello."

"Oh I will, and make sure that message gets to Blitzy. I'll be waiting for him."