Vague Existence

Chapter 12: Mew

.....fuck me in an alley.
.....fuck me in an alley.
.....fuck me in an alley.

Yup, that's right Mew, keep repeating it in your head until your balls become blue. I can literally hit a baseball with my dick with how hard it is right now. The cold shower didn't help a bit and I refuse to masturbate with him in my head. Sure, I imagined him that one time in the office. I feel my spine tingling when he calls me Sir. BUT THAT WAS ALL ME. Knowing about his dream and what he thinks of me when he's drunk changes things. Just thinking about his dick thickening and touching my thigh.... Fuck! I need another shower.

Why does he even drink if he can't handle himself? Is he always like this when he's drunk? What if it wasn't me who saw them? What if it was some pervert who approached them? With that face... and that mouth, and that dick I almost touched... anything can happen.

And why the fuck do you even care Mew? Why the fuck do you even care?!!!! These argument I have with myself makes me so ashamed of my actions. Get yourself together and act like a decent adult you really are. He is your student and you have a girlfriend and he is first and foremost a man, that should bother you.

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He was not in class the next day. I was not surprised really. If it was me, I wouldn't go to class either. This gives me ample time to think about my next steps.

After basically two hours of moving around in my office because I can't sit still, I came up with a solution.
Just when I was about to call him though to discuss it, yes I got his number from the school records just because I can, my phone rang. My sister. My hand gripped the phone harder seeming to stop the call but as always, I can't ignore her.

"Hi lil' sis! How are you doing in Paris?"

"Hi big bro! It's cool here. I went to some of the art museums and I just realized that I want to study art."

"Art? I see." I was skeptical as usual. My sister changes her mind as often as she changes clothes, if only she's like this with the men she dates, I wouldn't worry about her crying.

"Yes, Art big bro. I really feel like I have something to contribute to this world. Besides, my latest break-up brought me some intense emotions and I think the best way to get over him is to pour it out with my new passion."

Fuck! I almost forgot that I met Gulf because of my sister. I am now more convinced of my decision. "I guess if that's how you can forget then I wouldn't stop you. Speaking of forgetting, ummm, have you been to your therapist lately? I sent you a name of a doctor there. Have you met him already?"

"No.------ Mew, I decided not to remember things anymore. It's just a couple of minutes lost in my memory."

"What are you talking about? You know that this is the only way we can clean your name," I said.

"I just really want to move on. I think some parts of me doesn't want to remember too. Besides, Uncle had covered for me, remember? You shouldn't worry about it anymore," Lisa said.

I feel myself getting angry again. That is something that our Uncle has over us, her memory. And that's also the reason why I have a hard time getting what's suppose to be mine and my sister. My sister doesn't know though and I'd like it to remain that way.

Just a couple of minutes talking to my sister had me having second thoughts again with my decision.