Don't give up on me ✓

[13] Poison on my lips

Last night I saw you in my dreams, now I can't wait to go to sleep – Kanye

Chapter 13: Poison on my lips

He's just a boy that happens to look like the sexiest man alive.

That's all he is.

And he uses people. Probably. I don't really know, but I can't get involved... anymore than I already am.

That kiss though.

It felt like poison on my lips and I wanted all of it. Something that was so wrong but felt so good. I tried to shake my mind from Nate. Today had gotten very heated – in more ways than one. 

I went over to Jesper's room to find some calm and stability.

He was in his bathroom, washing the blood off his hands. I stood at the door, watching him. His handsome frown as he aggressively rubbed soap on his hands, trying to scrape all the blood off his skin. There was a lot.

"I'm sorry," I told him, "We're trapped here because of me."

Jesper stared down at his bloodied hands.  And for the first time in our lives, he asked me, "What are you, Georgia?"

I don't know who I am. I don't know what I am anymore.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Steam from the shower choked my tears. I scrubbed myself with two bars of soap until my skin was red and sore. Every speck of dirt I wanted off of me. I wanted all of this to go away.

Please just be a dream.

But when I got out of the shower, I wasn't in my bedroom back home. No posters on my wall and clothes on the floor. I was in Maythorne Manor, where my room had flowery wallpaper and the clothes in my closet were not even mine. They loosely fit me though. Emily must have gotten them.

I sniffed as I picked an outfit for dinner. I was going through the motions. Brushing my hair and getting dressed. None of it mattered. I couldn't get this afternoon out of my head.

A man's arm had been ripped off. 10 people died.

And now it was dinner time.

Tell me how this is normal.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

"Can you pass the mashed potatoes please?" Hugo asked.

Someone handed it to him.

"Aren't you going to eat?" Mohan asked me.

I stared down at my plate. Green beans, mashed potatoes and crab cake sliders. Nothing about it felt appetizing. My mouth tasted like dirt. I looked over at Jesper. At least he had his appetite.

"What were you doing near town, Zander?" Mrs Maythorne asked one of the new people.

It sounded like regular dinner conversation. But nothing that followed it was.

"I escaped the prison a couple months ago. I ran into these two a while back and we tried to find others like us. There are many rumors about this place, Mrs Maythorne, but you are very hard to find."

"Intentionally so," she responded curtly.

"Well we found you," the new girl said. She looked about thirty years old with straggly brown hair and a wild disposition. "You were looking for Kaya."

My ears pricked. I'd heard so much about this Kaya. Did they finally have answers?

"So you know her?"

Zander nodded.

"Well?" Hugo pushed.

"She was in the prison with me."

Great, more criminals.

The conversation at the table dried up. We ate quickly and skipped dessert. I could see that Mrs Maythorne was just being polite but she really wanted to talk business. And I was half paying attention, half looking at Nathaniel.

He sat on the other end of the table, eating his food silently. He didn't get involved in the politics. And he didn't look my way once. His head was lowered as he ate - all I saw was his messy brown hair.

People let him do whatever he wanted, like a boy with too many toys. He plays with people's emotions. How could he kiss me like that? 

After the plates were cleared, he got up and excused himself. He said he was going for a run.

I watched him leave. He went up to his room to change while I sat at the dinner table, listening to boring adult conversation. The dining hall doors were still open, so when he came back down I saw him. I tried to be subtle, pretending to listen, but really I was just admiring from afar.

He had a baseball cap on and a gray shirt cut at the shoulders. His arm muscles on display.

"Excuse me," I said to everyone and exited the dining room. I made sure to close the doors, so they wouldn't see.

Nate had music playing in earphones, so he didn't hear me coming. He was wearing a gray shirt, black shorts and Nike airs.

I came from behind and took an earphone out of his ear. "I can think of other ways you can work out."

He pressed pause on the music.

I had his attention. I softly slid my hands up his back and then pressed down on his hard shoulder muscles. He tensed under my grip. His back was still facing me, but he turned his head to me.

"That's very provocative."

"You provoked me when you kissed me today."

He turned around to face me, "You kissed back."

Yah 

"I did," I admitted.

Now that we faced each other, he walked towards me, forcing me back against the wall. He raised my arm over my head, trapping it under his.  

I brought my lips to his ear and whispered, "Let's not overthink this."  

That must've hit a spot. His breathing was heavy, and his dark hair brushed against my face as he leaned his lips onto mine, "You planning to slap me again?"

"Only if you don't behave," I said, taking my time with the words because his eyes were fixed on my lips.

He closed the distance between us and lowered his mouth closer to mine. Right when our lips were about to touch, I turned my face away. I ground my hips against him to push him backwards. He growled.

I said, "Let's keep space between us."

I didn't appreciate being toyed around, I didn't need any more emotional confusion in my life and I wanted to take the power back. I pushed him away and gave him a kiss on his soft lips - I just wanted to do it one last time. Sue me.

Before he could do any more damage, I pulled the cap down over his eyes and went to the dining room, not even looking back.

He lifted his cap and watched me go. He bit his bottom lip. "That was hot, Red." 

A/N: (Un)lucky Chapter13!! Reactions? Surprised, not surprised... Lmk xxx