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As usual, I was right and you returned the very next day, a little over five hours after I had opened the store. You opened the door holding a reusable coffee cup but you were wearing a black pantsuit, you didn't strike me as the type of girl to wear a pantsuit and drink coffee, Doc Martens but I guess that's what love is, accepting your person for who they are, every single aspect, every quality, every flaw.

You walked with confidence and importance and I could tell from your outfit, you had every right to walk with such status. You saw me upon entering and I was expecting that friendly smile but it didn't come, embarrassment washed over your face immediately but there was nothing to be embarrassed about. Okay, yes, you may have ran out and left me holding a paperback copy of "And I Still Rise" all because of the man in the hoodie whom I couldn't seem to get out of my head since you left but it was all alright, I'd definitely see past it once you explained who he was.

You went straight to the poetry section and found your desired book yourself, there was no fear instilled in you anymore, it was as if you were a completely different person from the girl last night. Then you turned on your heels and walked straight up to me. "Thanks so much for all your help yesterday. Sorry, I just uh ran out. My boyfriend was waiting, you know how men can be" you rambled on. Boyfriend ? That man was your boyfriend. The man who was supposed to love, cherish and treat you as though you were the queen of his kingdom was the reason you were so terrified. He was the reason your brain was so fried you couldn't even think straight and checked your phone and my window as though they were the ones going to hurt you. I had to nod and say the word "men" as if it were dirty but I was beyond angry. No person on earth deserves you if that's how they're going to treat you. You, are a rose amongst thorns and there was no other way to describe you. From what I've seen, you smile a lot, it can't all be genuine and you even took the time to apologise to me, a complete stranger and after dealing with whatever happened the night before, you could hold a conversation. This is you and I'm addicted.

"Doctor Maya Angelou" I said in hopes of changing the topic, I ignored your apology because there was no need for one. "Big fan of her work, I have my own copy but I need a present for my mother and she has a thing with books, has to be paperback" you explained through a shrug while handing me the exact amount for the book. I hadn't even rung you up yet but you're an intellectual and you're strong, independent and you have the most captivating eyes, I could stare into them for the rest of our lives. "It's heartbreaking to hear what happened to her isn't it ? I get chills every-time I see her face, to think she trusted the guy and he could do such a thing" you said while picking up a copy of Beck's book and for a split second my heart sung, not for Beck but for you. You were extremely empathetic that you felt her pain so much that it was nearly as if you'd experienced it yourself. You had a genuine frown on your face and your eyes were glued to her picture, all I could do was grunt out a half-assed "yeah", if only you knew the real her.

"I've read it countless times, she had such a way with words. I'd definitely say a gift" you continued as I smiled at you, fair, definitely not the time to smile but what was there to be sad about when around you ?. "I should be at work right now but I'm hiding. Eighteen year old me thought being an accountant would be a lot better than it actually is" you said disappointed, I was right, you are an intellectual and it was making me fall for you even more. "Mooney's needs to look into getting one, we're way behind on books" I joked, it was a joke but it wasn't a joke, we do need one and are behind on books but I wasn't suggesting you or maybe subconsciously I was. Your whole face lit up at my offer masked as a joke and it put me at ease. "I wouldn't even mind. It sounds exciting" you said through a huge smile, you were bubbly, I liked it. I haven't fallen for someone as smart as you but I could see it. A stress free life where the wife is the breadwinner and a happy house husband with his own bookstore who have nothing to fight about ever because what would we ever disagree on ?.

You propped your Louis Vuitton up on the counter and began rooting through the clutter until you found a card for a firm I had passed too many times to count, Murphy's. I scanned it for one reason and one reason only, I needed your name. "Kelsey Elliott" I announced to the store as you nodded and leant over the counter for a couple of second to read my name tag. "That's my name, uh, Joe" you said softly, I wanted you to say my name over and over and over. Kelsey Elliott. Kelsey Goldberg. Joe and Kelsey Goldberg has a ring to it. We'd be the couple everyone envied and and we'd have an eternal burning love that everybody so desperately spends their lives searching for and craving. 

You checked your phone for the millionth time and rolled your eyes. It was like the small device was part of your acrylics. It was a habit I knew you wouldn't have if it wasn't for the man from last night. I had to find a way to get rid of this distraction. Benji. Peach. Ron. Beck. No, there's no way I could go back there, I said it would be different this time. "Shit, well I better go but thanks, again for all your help" you said through yet another smile as you took the paper bag off the table. You received a phone call as you were heading to the door and I saw you panic for a split second, you thought nobody noticed but I did and my concern sky rocketed.

"Oh, hi baby" you said, your voice was laced with fake niceness Kelsey, any fool could see it but it isn't something you'd have to do with me, I'd allow you to feel whatever you wanted to. You can't put rules on emotions. "Coffee ?" you asked with your head titled, you said it like it was a question but from the excuses I could see whizzing around your head, it became apparent the person on the other end of the phone had asked you. "I'm at work but yeah, you're right I suppose we haven't spent much time together recently. L-let's go get coffee" you went on, still with this fake voice but you looked so sad and I wanted to say something to you but I just couldn't. I couldn't because you darted straight out of the store.

Curiosity killed the cat but I had to know who was putting you through this pain and a quick social media search led me there. Your name isn't too generic but it took me a couple of scrolls to find you. Facebook was the home of flaunting how perfect life is and how rich you can pretend to be but this wasn't the case with you. You had a picture of you at a music festival, this told everyone that although you work hard, you know how to relax and let your hair down and I respect that. Besides from that, it was your interest which was mostly books and movies you enjoyed but that was it or so I thought. I knew there would be more photos once I knew you enough to send a friend request but as I kept scrolling I found something.

"In a relationship with Max Johnson", the words sickened me. Max on the other hand's favourite hobby was flaunting his life. Your profile pictures matched but he wasn't in yours, you were in his though. You sat on his shoulder smiling with your hands in the air. Of course, he was shirtless and covered in tattoos that I knew held no meaning to him. He and I are complete opposites but I refuse to let him get in the way of us Kelsey. There's a cafe right by Murphy's, Mooneys needs to close early and anyone with half of a brain would understand why.

Her // Joe Goldberg (COMPLETED)Where stories live. Discover now