again

five.

"Detective, a new case just dropped- you're on it." Lieutenant states, dropping the file in front of me, on Ella's lab table. It's late, so I'll start the case in the morning.

Detective,
That was his nickname for me, it's also my position but usually people just call me Chloe or Decker. I haven't been called Detective since Lucifer left.

"Chloe, are you okay?" Ella asks, hopefully

"Yeah." I whisper, the pad of my finger pressing against the file, I pause

Silence follows, Ella doesn't move, she stares, waiting for me to continue

"No, no I'm not okay Ella. I don't know what to do." I admit

"I know, Chloe." She replies, "we can all see it,"

"I miss him. I told him I loved him and he left- you know who else did that?" I ask, looking at her

"Chloe, I'm sure he didn't mean to hurt you."

"No. I know he didn't mean to, but it doesn't stop it. It physically hurts Ella, I feel sick all the time, I can't sleep at night and I'm exhausted all day- I can't eat.
I can't dream anymore because every time I close my eyes I see him, my heart hurts, Ella." I admit, tears streaming down my face, she envelopes me into a hug.

"I'm so sorry Chloe- I wish there was something I could do." She says, I hear her voice break too

"No, don't be sorry. It's not your fault," I admit, she nods

"I wish he could see how he's hurting you." She says, I shake my head
"I don't,"

I get home late, my legs hurt and my chest feels heavy. I want to break down again, but I can't.

"Hey Maze, can we talk?" I ask

"Feelings don't work for me Decker, you know that." She states, sternly

"I just need to ask you something-" I beg, "Please?" I ask, she closes her eyes for a second before nodding

"What is it?" She asks, sitting beside me on the sofa

"I just need to ask you something, and I need you to be one hundred percent honest, don't worry about my feelings." I state, she smiles at me

"Decker, I never worry about your feelings."

"Right- do you, think, Lucifer might come back?" I ask, she freezes in her seat, her eyes dart away from my face

"Chloe, I-" she starts

"Just, think, you know him better than anyone ever could. Just tell me what you think. Even if you're wrong,"

"I don't think he's coming back, Chloe." She admits, I nod slowly

"That's what i thought." I reply, she nods "Thank you for taking care of Trixie these past few days." I add, she smiles lightly

"It's not a problem." she tells me "I like her,"

"I'm scared, Maze." I admit

"You know- you could always talk to Linda about this stuff too." She offers

"She knows?" I ask, she nods

"For a while now- way longer than you." Maze replies, I raise my eyebrows

"She doesn't care?" I ask, Maze looks at me viciously

"Do you?"

I pause, I didn't care that Lucifer was the devil- I just wanted him to be back. I didn't care anymore, it couldn't bother me any more than him being gone.
"No," I reply, surely

She smiles lightly, and leans in "Trixie has seen my demon face."

I jump, "you showed my daughter? She's a kid maze!" I whisper shout

"Calm down, she thought it was a Halloween costume," she smirks, I sigh

"I will never understand you," I admit, she nods

"I know,"

After Maze heads to bed, I go upstairs.

I walk into the bathroom, turning the shower onto hot, I take my hair out. I run my fingers through it slowly, detangling it quickly.
I take my shirt off, followed by my pants, bra, and underwear.

I remember the time Lucifer checked my back for wings, the way his hands felt. The way his touch sent shivers down my spine.

The night drags out for what feels like forever, and by the time I finally get to sleep I need to be up for work.
I remember what Maze said; "you know- you could always talk to Linda about this stuff too."

Sighing I grab out my phone; and send Linda a message.
'Hey, can I stop by your office later?'
She doesn't reply right away, I assume she's busy and put my phone in my pocket.

Time to go to work.