October 18, 1966
Turn off your mind, relax
And float down stream
It is not dying
It is not dying
Lay down all thought
Surrender to the void
It is shining
It is shining
That you may see
The meaning of within
It is being
It is being
That love is all
And love is everyone
It is knowing
It is knowing
I was busy listening to The Beatles’ newest album, Revolver, and I must say that The Beatles did it again—the music was amazing. I was lounging in my bed and was beginning to doze off when Greg, my roommate, violently shook my shoulders until I was very much awake. I gave him a deathly glare to signify how much I wanted to kill him right then and there because no one disturbs my nap time.
“Don’t look at me like that man. Don’t you know it’s that time of the year?”
I sat up and looked at him questioningly. “What do you mean it’s that time of the year?”
“Oh you know, very attractive freshmen moving in across our dorm.” He wiggled his eyebrows, and I knew he was dragging me into some mischief.
It was in the middle of October, but autumn made no sign of making its presence felt. I had nothing else to do in this hot, lazy Sunday afternoon, so I already made two strides out of the door as Greg followed suit.
What immediately caught my eye was a blonde, blue-eyed angel who seemed to having a difficulty in carrying a box full of records. Being the gentleman that I am, I was faster than lightning in offering my help.
“Hello miss, I see you’re having quite a hard time carrying that box. May I be of some help?” I flashed a charming smile at her, but when she looked at me, I noticed her expression had not visibly softened; despite the cold viciousness of her demeanor, she was breathtakingly beautiful. I could not care less if her glare froze me to death.
She responded in a polite, breezy tone. “I appreciate your help, but I’m fine.”
I continued to follow her as she entered the hallway of the ladies’ dorm. “Are you sure? You still have a few steps to climb.”
She sighed, and the conviction was unmistakable in her voice. “I know you’re being a gentleman and all, but I’m not as delicate as you think I am. Women have always been pampered and put on pedestals to be admired as ornaments or adornments. I believe I’m much more than a doll or a pretty thing to be stared at, since I’m fully capable of carrying my things. Don’t you think so?”
I was flabbergasted. I have never met any woman like her. The women I have always known were submissive: they were always so demure, so conservative, and they have not dared to speak ideas which were so liberal. She was beautiful, but I was definitely mesmerized by her intelligence.
She did not give me enough time to form a coherent response, so I still followed her. Eventually, I gave my best retort at the moment, “You know, most women would just accept my help and make things a whole lot easier.”
Finally she reached her door, put down the box and looked at me with mild annoyance. “Well I’m not like most women, so if you would excuse me, I still need to unload a few more boxes, so perhaps we can chat some other time.”
She swiftly walked past me, but before I caught up, I saw a picture frame peeking from the box. Curiosity killed the cat, but I looked at the photo anyway; what I saw shocked me—she has a picture with Martin Luther King Jr.! Right beside it, she has a few rainbow-colored objects and the exact same record I was listening to a few moments ago. This girl is—
“Are you done snooping through my stuff?” Her voice surprised me, and when I turned around I was even more surprised to find her less than a foot away from me. She was dangerously close, and I could smell a faint floral fragrance. Thankfully I was given this opportunity to look at her face up close, and I realized she was definitely like a porcelain doll.
She laughed as if she was mocking me. “First, you snoop through my stuff. Second, you stare at me shamelessly. Are you planning on adding more reasons why I should dislike you?”
“No no no… I’m sorry I’ve been acting this way. It’s just that I find you… fascinating.” I needed to be careful with the way I act. I am not letting this girl go.
She raised her eyebrow. “Is that so?”
“Yes. And I definitely would want to get to know you.”
She smiled and shook her head, and then she looked at me as if she was pondering on something. “Alright, let’s go for a walk around campus. Since I’m a freshman, you could show me around. But, I only get to give you my name if I decide I like you. Do we have a deal?”
Her hand was outstretched, and in a heartbeat I shook her hand. “Deal.” I smiled.
When we were on our way downstairs, I was surprised when she greeted a black woman who was also on her to the same room. “Hi Loretta, I hope you don’t mind just leaving my stuff unpacked. I’ll take care of it later.” Ms. Mystery smiled at the black woman with so much congeniality and warmth; I wish she smiled at me like that, too.
When we were outside taking a leisurely stroll throughout the campus, I casually asked her, “So you’re friends with that nigger?”
She suddenly stopped in her tracks and her eyes looked like they bore the fiery pits of hell. “Don’t you ever say that word! Ever!” She told me vehemently and zoomed past me so that I had to catch up to her.
She continued brisk walking as I strived to match her quick pace. “It seems odd for a woman to wear her views on social and political issues right on her sleeve.”
“Why, you think that just because I’m a woman, and I can’t be entitled to speak my own mind about what’s going on? I care about the world I live in, and I don’t want to just sit around and play housewife.” Suddenly she stopped and sat on a nearby bench. I sat beside her, and then she looked at me intently.
“I know it’s hard to say now, but the times are a-changin’, and people oughtta realize that. Maybe I couldn’t be the one to change something in this world, but maybe my children will, or my grandchildren will, and somehow I would just be content knowing that I’ve made a difference.”
I knew in my heart she bore her soul to me right then and there, and from that moment I have helplessly fallen into a pit where she was the only one who could save me. “I know you will.”
Later that night, I fumbled through my old box of precious belongings and finally found what I was looking for.
Sempre e per sempre
I smiled for I knew just to whom I would give it to when it was the right time.
