I'm tired of black men...but then again I'm not

Dec 6th - Justin's Birthday

KaShay

What do you get a man that has everything? I have no clue, but I have been pondering on it all week.

Justin has given me the world, plus more, in these couple of months we have been dating, and I wish to only provide him with the same.

Thanks to his encouragement, I quit my job and started working on my writing full time.

Honestly, it has been enriching and stimulating, and just what I needed.

I'm glad I took his advice and invested into myself. It has been so fulfilling and the best decision I've ever made.

He has been a great addition to my life, and I thank the heavens for him every day. He is one of my ampler choices, and sometimes I wonder how did I get so lucky.

It seems so long ago when I was searching for love in all the wrong places. When the entire time I was in the right place, and love was searching for me.

So glad it found me.

However, now it's my turn to make Justin as happy as he makes me.

Sadly, he has mentioned to me on several occasions, he doesn't want anything for his birthday and that I'm the greatest gift he has ever received. Although I know that's partly true; I believe he has to want something.

Everyone low-key wants something. Even when people say they don't, they do.

I'm entirely aware he truly adores me and worships the ground I walk on, but he still has to want something other than me.

So, I planned a fun and eventful night out in town for him to enjoy for his birthday.

I have a list of all his favorite places he loves to go and fancies, and I rented them all out for an hour for just the two of us to enjoy.

I'm sure he will enjoy this, and I can not wait to surprise him.

He has meetings until five today. So that gives me enough time to execute my plan and keep his curiosity low because he is so hard to surprise.

I lied and told him I would be packing up my things at my apartment to move in with him. Because that was his only birthday request, it is for me to move in with him completely.

Even though I spend the bulk of my time at his house, I still treasure my own space from time to time, and if anything ever happens between the two of us, not saying it will, but if it does, I still have somewhere to go.

Also, it gives me an excuse to see Shanty.

She's already complaining that I don't come by enough once I started dating Justin, a.k.a the "white boy."

Shanty refuses to call Justin by his name for some unknown reason, no matter how many times I correct her. So, now, I just ignore her.

We all know how stubborn those Tauruses can be.

I know she hates my relationship with Justin, and I honestly can't blame her. We made a pact years ago to never date outside our race.

Mainly because no other man will understand our struggle. The struggle of a black woman in America. It's an ongoing battle of discrimination, doubt, and constant reassurance of who we are.

I call it the recipe of oppression.

However, Justin has opened my eyes up to a new reality with possibilities I never knew existed. Which Shanty will never understand or even try to understand. Except, I'm not asking her to, but only to trust that I will never put myself in harm's way or anybody that I love for that matter.