Chap 29: Where are you?

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The night was cold. There was an emptiness hanging in the air. Loneliness crept in, enveloping him in its icy hold. The world had never seemed so quiet, so vast. His apartment had never felt so dark and cold until he was left to wallow in his own pain, alone and abandoned. He could feel his mark ache, pulsating with the desire to be near his mate. His wolf howled restlessly in distress, throning after its mate that wasn't there.

Will he ever come back? Will he ever be by his side again?

He's gone and fear begun to sink in that he may never see his mate again and all he could think was it's all his fault. He felt his heart tearing. Being away from his mate who he knew was pregnant carrying his pups was destroying him. He had to be near him, near his pup growing inside his mates stomach. His instincts told him to search through the night, hunt every inch of the city until he found his pregnant mate. He wanted so badly to hunt for him, to sniff out his intoxicating scent but he couldn't. He was trapped in his bounds of self hatred and torment.

He laid curl up in a ball on Jimin's side of the bed hugging his blanket that still smelt of him. His scent envelopes his nostrils, invading his senses only making him throne for his mate more.

It was cruel-Torturous really.

His heart ached and his wolf cried. He'd never felt so much pain in his entire life. There was a knife being pushed into his heart ever so slowly, twisting and piercing every nerve sparking merciless waves of pain. He didn't know what to do with this feeling. He was usually so strong, things rarely brought him to tears. But Jimin brought emotions out of him he's never felt before. He's never felt so weak, so full of regret and self loathing he wanted to cry his heart out and punch things at the same time.

"Please come back!"

He cries into Jimin's pillow he's clutching, squeezing it close to him. It smelt sweet, calming and soothing even if just a little bit. He needed his scent to keep him from completely breaking. He could still see the terrifying fear in Jimin's eyes as he choked him with his cruel hold. He didn't know what he was doing, he had no idea. His emotions took over him and he blacked out, leaving his body, becoming unaware of the actions he was making. If he had known, if he had realised what he was doing he'd have stopped before he couldn't laid a hand on him.

He was worried. Not knowing where his pregnant mate was was truly killing him. Torture in itself among other things.

Where was he? Was he safe? Was the baby safe?

He needed to know because not knowing was driving him insane, to the brink of insanity. Depression began to kick in as darkness settled in along with the loneliness.

He was so alone. He's always been alone but then he wasn't when he met Jimin. He finally had someone to lighten up his otherwise glum world. For a moment he was happy and everything was bright and then it suddenly wasn't. He was now alone again and it hurt more than he could remember.

Being alone was frightening. There was nothing but silence and your own gruesome thoughts. Your thoughts aren't always scary but when they were you had no where to hide. That's how he felt. He felt trapped, unable to run away from the pain or the fear as it was eating him from the insane out.

He missed him. He missed him so much and it had barely been more than a few hours. But that's how it feels to be in love. To be so in love that even being separated for more than a moment ached. He was aching and all he could do was howl for his pregnant mate.

"Please come back! Please don't leave me!" He howls into the night, wolf whining in sorrow at the lost they were both feeling.

He's never felt so broken-not since his mother died when he was only a child. He remembered what it felt like to mourn, to cry, to throne for someone who wasn't there. He would howl at night hoping his mother might hear his cries but of course she never did. She was gone, taken from him so cruelly he thought he'd never face such pain again. But just like back then he was howling for Jimin to come back but his pleas were not being heard. He wasn't coming back and he was beginning to believe he wouldn't ever come back.

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⏰ Last updated: Feb 12, 2022 ⏰

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