I tried to fight back a tear but it dripped down my cheek before he'd even said anything.
I could tell he'd been crying too.
Our eyes stare into each other, neither of us know what do to next. My heart is racing and shattering at once.
"Hi." Harry said quietly standing at the door.
I sat up. I didn't know what to do or say. I didn't expect to see him. I was shocked.
My heart felt even more broken seeing him and his red eyes sore from crying just like mine.
"Hi." I finally said back.
We sat in awkward silence for a minute both with tears in our eyes. Harry still standing in the doorway.
"I'm sorry." I finally said. He came over and sat on the edge of the bed.
"You were just gone." He paused. You could hear the sadness and heartbreak in his voice. "With only a note? You just want to end it, everything with no explanation? You're just giving up?"
"It's supposed to be easier this way." I looked around the room avoiding eye contact with him.
"Easier than what? Look at us." He motioned between us.
"Harry it won't work we will be half a world away from each other." I began to list every reason I am right.
"And you're just going to give up without even trying?" His voice is quiet as he speaks full of sadness.
"Try for what? For us to fall in love even more and then for it to just end anyway? You'll forget about me faster and be able to go back to your amazing life without me in your way."
"Who says it will end? I've never felt this way about anyone, I meant that when I told you. I know you meant it too. I will fight everything for you. I will never forget about you, you mean everything and more to me. My life wouldn't be amazing without you in it."
I stared at the ceiling to try and slow down my tears. Harry put his hand on my leg and rubbed it in comfort.
I moved closer to him and he pulled me into a hug with my face buried in his chest.
"Harry, I don't deserve you go be with some-" I cried into his chest.
"Don't finish that sentence. I don't want to be with anyone but you. And never think otherwise." He brushed his fingers through my hair and kissed the top of my head holding me close to him.
"Harry it's not going to work." I mumbled into his shirt.
"Ro, we will figure it out. I'm not letting you push me away. I know that's what you do when you have something good, not this time. I love you okay?"
"I love you too but what about-" I looked up to him, he has so much hope in his eyes and I don't get how.
"We will figure it out, I promise."
"Can I just say this?"
"Sure."
"Okay say I come back to college and we try to make it all work and we break up. Then what? We will just be more heart broken."
"Then at least we tried."
"What if I took a year off of school and stayed on tour and then we break up and then I have nothing."
"I would never leave you with nothing but what if things do work and we end up happy?"
"I don't know."
"Then why are you so quick to give up on us?"
"Because you deserve better."
"Better than you? Rowan you make me the happiest I've ever been. This summer and tour would have been nothing without you there. Being with you makes me feel ways I never have before."
