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Does the truth imprison us, or does it set us free? One thing we know for sure, the truth can hurt. Ask a drug or alcohol addict who has faced friends and professionals in an intervention. The addict arrives home, or at work to discover a room full of people well known to him. The addict takes one look around, and he knows what has happened. One person takes the lead, and then it is on if the addict does leave in a fury. Even then, they have had a head-on collision with the truth. The truth is the addict is ruining his life and the lives of those in his family. The addict is faced with a mirror of himself, and the love and concern of these others. Hopefully, he will see the truth in their eyes and words. Some do hear and turn their lives around. Facing the truth about our negative sides is a difficult thing to do. However, none of us can improve without knowing the truth, even when it hurts. If we learn, the truth does set us free.
Claire stands at the window once again, eyes on a tree she had no interest in. At the moment, her mind doesn't register the children passing by or the fact that Noel had left a couple of minutes ago. His question still lingers in her mind. "Are you willing to die for two girls that aren't yours and leave your actual children all alone?" How can she reply to it? She hasn't thought of it like that, but Josie and Lizzie are hers. . . aren't they? She gave birth to them. Raised them. Loved them. She looks at them as if they were hers, but the truth is that they aren't hers.
So was she being stupid for dying? Dying for someone who wasn't her blood? Was she being selfish? Selfish for wanting to give two innocent girls a chance to outlive their lives? Did that make her a bad mother? A bad mother for leaving her children alone? Will her children become to hate her at the end when they know the truth? Will they hate her or the girls? She didn't want Theo, Lottie, and Beau to hate Josie and Lizzie, they're innocent. Will they turn on them? She hopes not. Did it make her a bad sister? A bad sister for not thinking about Caroline? How does she feel about all of this? Will Caroline hate her if she goes through with it? Claire has been so determined to not let the girls merge and was willing to do anything even give up her life for it. She hasn't talked to her or Alaric or their children. And if she doesn't go with it, did it make her a bad friend? Will she be a bad friend if she leaves the girls to merge? Will Theo, Lottie, Beau resent her for not stopping it from happening? Will they hate her? The more Claire thinks about the whole situation, it all came back to someone hating her.
The one thing Claire Forbes doesn't want is someone hating her at the end of all this. She lives for her family and she'll die for her family - whether or not they share blood.
Claire walked past the heavy stone door and closed it, so no one would suspect that she has entered this place. She hasn't been in here since the Mikaelson came back, which makes her feel guilty and ashamed. It's not like she has forgotten about her husband just because her ex-fiancee came back, no it wasn't because of that. She hasn't been in here because she didn't know how she felt about the whole thing; them being back, seeing Niklaus after he had felt, seeing Hope in person, having her children behaving like their father, dealing with the whole merge, dealing with Noel and everything else was just too much for her. . . or so she thought herself.
She doesn't touch anything in here, she simply sits on the floor, her back against the tomb and her arms wrapped around her knees. Claire sighs heavily, closes her eyes, and lets the memories come to her. Like a great rush of water, the memory came back to her. Sometimes his memory can make her sad, he was her best friend in the beginning. Stefan Salvatore - fiercely loyal and overprotective, she needed that. She needed someone to be there for her like she was with them and he was just that person. Despite his love for Elena, Stefan would always make time for her. They would often go out on best friend dates, where they would go out of town to get ice cream or to shop. Stefan would often make her blueberry waffles at 2 in the morning just because she was craving them. He would often come over and tell her all of his problems with Elena and Damon or with really anyone or anything.
"I don't know what to do, Stefan," she whispers, afraid that she might disturb his sleep. She thought back to the days where they stayed up at night and talked about their problems. A sad smile appeared on her face when she remembers that she was the first person Stefan told her his whole life to, he told her everything, every little detail. He even told her about him being the ripper. Claire Forbes was Stefan Salvatore's best friend, the first friend after Lexi.
Claire opened her eyes, "I am wrong?" she pounders on that idea. Is she wrong or is she not? How does one know if they're wrong? She's doing something good but is she wrong to do it? Will be consequences for her action? Who was she kidding? Of course, there will be. But will it be worth it?
Claire reached into her trench coat and took out a picture. Although it was folded in half, it was well taken care of. She stares at it and that's all it took. A photograph, that was all it took for the tears to burst Claire's damn of restraint. She clutched the thin paper like a sheet in her hand, somehow able to see a ghostly reflection of her face. She looked past her own dreary eyes and stared upon his face that had been caught in a moment of perfection. It was the happiest memories that hurt the worst, they were the ones that cut her deepest. She focused on his eyes, they were glistening with the twinkle of laughter that once she loved. Now, they laughed at her. They reminded her of what she had lost.
A last lone tear fell down her face, the wish for him to be here fills Claire with such rage and bitterness that she thinks she'll explode. One day she will properly grieve for him, but first, she would have to accept he is gone - and though she dug his grave herself there's a part of her that holds the memory back. There's part of her that will never believe he won't come bouncing around some corner to laugh at her for falling for this elaborate joke. "I wish you were here to guide," Claire wiped away the tears.
