Chapter 23 - Secrets of the Soul

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I know it's been a really long wait but I've had to re-write the chapter so many times because i want it to be perfect. Boy are y'all in for a treat!! ;)

 Al went straight to the library after speaking to Lupin and handed Madame Pince her signed note who raised her eyebrows and sighed before heading off to find the book. A good five minutes later she returned with the unlocked, leather-bound volume held in both her hands. "It doesn't leave the library and you need to return it right back to me when you're done," she told her.

 Al nodded, "Thanks." The book was heavy in her hands and she almost dropped it hauling it to a nearby table next to Granger, who had her nose buried deep in a book, as per usual. She flicked through it, looking for something on the killing curse. Most of it was handwritten and in Latin though. Al sighed - this was hopeless. "Granger," she whispered to the next table. She didn't move. "Granger," Al hissed louder, only to receive a glare from the librarian. Al sighed again, "Hermione?" she asked.

 The bushy-haired girl turned, smiling in what was clearly a false manner, "How can I help?"

 "I knew you could hear me," Al mumbled, "Do you know any translating spells?"

 Granger thought for a moment, "You could try traduirum," she suggested.

 "Right, thanks," Al said turning back to her book.

 "What are you translating?" Granger asked, peering over.

 "You're a nosy one, aren't you?" Al retorted without looking up.

 Granger threw her hands up, "Sorry. Just asking," she said, turning back to her own dusty volume.

 Al performed the spell, as instructed and to her surprise, it worked. She could read all the words on the page and understand them. Cool! She flicked through until she saw mention of the killing curse next to a diagram of a lightening bolt wand action - like Harry's scar!

 She read through the passage:

 The killing curse is the most dangerous and dark spell I have ever created, performed with the incantation 'Avada Kedavra'. It will surely serve my descendants well but is a difficult spell for those of good will to perform.

 It requires the opposite intent and therefore emotion to the Patronus charm. For it to be used successfully, one must muster all the hate for the individual they are to perform it on. If done well, it will produce a green light.

 The curse works by severing the soul completely from the body, similar to how the dementor's kiss works, and as long as the soul is strong and has nowhere to go, it will move onto another life, never to return to the possessor's body. If the soul is weakened or has been previously split, I theorise that it will only shatter the soul further or destroy it.

 Should the soul have an anchor to this world, the soul piece will remain here unable to move on but damned forever without its owner. This is theory only.

 Al hurriedly scrambled through her bag in search of parchment and ink. She found what she needed and drew herself a diagram. She and Harry were next to each other in the crib and Voldemort stood directly in front of Harry. The curse was fired at Harry - she drew an arrow from Voldemort to Harry. But it must've somehow rebounded - she drew an arrow from Harry to Voldemort. Voldemort had split his soul for horcruxes, so according to this book it may have shattered, meaning there are two soul pieces freed. One of them escaped - the one that had possessed Quirrell - so only one remained.

 But that meant the curse hadn't fully severed the soul from the body - only partially severed it. So only part of the curse was used, meaning it still had to hit someone else. Her hand shaking, Al drew a dotted arrow from Voldemort to herself. But if only part of a curse hit her, it could only partially sever her soul. And her soul hadn't been weakened before so it wouldn't shatter; meaning it would have remained whole and in this world, but not in her body. So where the hell was it?

 There was only one living person left in that room. It wouldn't go to Voldemort - his body was dead. And it couldn't go back to her. So Harry had her soul. And most likely the leftover bits of Voldemort's too.

 "Oh my God," she breathed. It couldn't be true - it just couldn't. But it did make sense; the Dementor's kiss hadn't worked because there was no soul to take. And the same applied to the Basilisk's eyes - her soul couldn't leave her body. Did this mean she was immortal? Al wasn't sure she liked the idea of that. Why wasn't she bursting with rage or sobbing with tears right now, then? She definitely wasn't happy about it - more uncomfortable. What if she couldn't feel? What had Lupin said about dementors when she zoned out on the train? 'Removing the soul will make a person a lifeless shell.'

*****

 Al wandered the hall of Hogwarts with no particular destination, but quickly all the same. Who could she tell? Or ask? Dumbledore definitely knew about it - there was no doubt. Why else hide the book? And Snape was his little puppet so that was out of bounds. Draco? What could he do? She didn't need comfort she needed truth. "Al!" a voice called out behind her and she turned to see Lupin leaning out his office, "Cup of tea?" he offered. She nodded - that was just what she needed.

 She went into his office and sat down in the chair opposite his desk, still a little shaky. Lupin bustled around with a teapot before he handed her a chipped mug and settled into his own chair, "Have you read the book yet?" he asked her and she nodded, "And? How did you find it?"

 "Well, Madame Pince got it for me, Sir," she said sarcastically.

 He chuckled, "Really, though? Everything you needed?"

 "I think so, Sir. Thank you."

 He sighed and placed his mug down on the table, "You can trust me, Al. I know you might not think so, but you can." He paused, then, "And if I say anything you can tell everyone my secrets too." Al forced a smile and took a sip of her tea. A horrible thought occurred to her - what if it was poisoned? But she knew it wouldn't affect her, so she relaxed a little and took another sip.

 "Is there anything you want to talk about?" Lupin asked with a gentle smile. Why did she trust him? She had every reason not to but she still did.

 "I don't think I have a soul," she stated and Lupin spluttered on his tea.

 "Everyone has a soul," he said, reaching for a napkin, "what makes you think you don't?" She fished in her bag for the diagram that she had drawn and he looked at it with bemusement reading her annotations and explanations. "So the arrows are the killing curse?"

 "Yes, Sir," she replied, placing her empty mug on the coaster.

 "But this is all hypothetical," he said, "Something very different could've happened instead."

 "But the Dementor's kiss didn't work on me - or the basilisk's eyes last year," she reasoned.

 "I did hear about that," Lupin said, "Very interesting." They sat in silence for a little while, both thinking about the points raised. Finally, Lupin spoke again, "I should keep this to yourself, Al. There isn't sufficient evidence to make it public knowledge, so to speak."

 "I understand, Sir. Thank you," she said getting up to leave.

 "Take care, Al," he told her as she left the office.

 "You too, Sir."

Alexandra Dursley {Golden Trio}Where stories live. Discover now