What Is and What Should Never Be | Sirius Black

1. Perfect Prefect Privilege

MY LOYALTY lay with Remus from the first moment we share on the train ride to Hogwarts.

I say 'Good Morning!' in my friendliest voice to the quiet boy that offers me a wave in the otherwise empty compartment. We had only moved to England a few months prior to my start at Hogwarts, so I had not made any friends in my new neighbourhood due to my new trouble with English. School doesn't teach much. At my greeting, his ears perk up - no doubt at my accent (which I've work hard to get rid of, though I'm told I merge some of my words too much)- and takes an immediate interest as to where I'm from, telling me he read a book about it's history and I smile.

And when I see Remus' eyes trail over to a shy boy who wrings his hands nervously, inviting him into our compartment without hesitation, I know that I made a good decision to take a liking to him.

Then I'm sorted into Hufflepuff, and Remus and Peter into Gryffindor. As he sits down at the table next to me, he turns his body and sends me a frown, but I simply clap and give him a beaming smile to show I'm proud of him. As said by the sorting hat, my just and loyal Hufflepuff self decides that it will take a lot more than different houses for Remus to get rid of me.

So, at the beginning of sixth year, I'm already scanning the platform for the mousy haired boy, determined to speak with him. He abandoned our usual tradition of textbook hunting in Diagon Alley, so I never got to ask why he stopped writing.

"Er - Hey, Des, I-" The familiar voice calls from behind me, and I turn around to give Remus a hug before he can finish.

"You need to stop growing." I state, my voice muffled by his chest. He just chuckles and lets go of me far sooner than normal.

Remus and I usually spend a couple weeks at each other's houses over the summer. But during the week he spent at mine, I woke up and he was gone without a trace, no note except for the floo powder residue in my fireplace. And then he stopped sending owls, like he just dropped off the face of the Earth.

It's weird, and unlike Remus.

"You split... suddenly." I accuse, alluding to said week.

His cheeks immediately blush and his hand comes up to scratch his jaw right under his chin.

"Yea - er - sorry about that." He stutters, not meeting my eyes. "Something came up."

"It's too bad," I prompt, "you missed Tina and her new broomstick."

Remus chuckles slightly, but doesn't meet my eyes.

"I'm really sorry, Des." He sighs. "It was bad timing and... it wont happen again."

I shake my head.

It was really bad timing, on both our parts. Only after he left did I see it was the day before the full moon. I cursed myself for being so forgetful, because Remus thinks I don't know about his lycanthropy, and I can only imagine the stress he felt when he noticed.

"Well I'm just happy to see you again." I say as the scarlet train blows its whistle. "Tell Jane we'll be in the same compartment as always."

I pick up my stuff and Remus just looks at me like he has something to say.

"Rem, you have a prefect meeting..." I remind him and he blinks a couple times, deciding not to express whatever's on his mind.

He grabs his trunk off the ground abruptly and gives me a quick wave. "Bye, Des."

"See ya?" I say more as a question at him odd behaviour.

It worries me slightly, but I don't have time to dwell on it when I notice the last people boarding the train and slip inside to go to find my compartment. Only Debbie is there, with a book in her lap, and barely giving me an acknowledgement until the end of her chapter. Only then does she greet me and help throw my extra luggage above the seats. Her greeting includes her usual beginning-of-the-year-complaints that she has to go all the way to London to get to school when she already lives in Scotland. I shrug.