My Highlander, My Love

Betray not my heart

Hawk walked like a zombie to his chambers where he knew Nessa waited for him. The castle had quieted down for the night, and he had only a few hours with her, until it was time to go. William had given Hawk some herbs to put in her tea, so she could fall into deep sleep while Hawk was away, that way she would not wake up early and suspect anything.

Opening the door quietly, he stepped inside and locked it. Walking over to the far end of the room, he placed the cup of tea on the table, and took a deep breath before he turned to face her. She was sitting on the edge of the bed, combing her long beautiful hair, and Hawk almost cried out loud with grief.

How was he ever going to betray her, he thought with a heavy heart. Removing his kilt, and discarding it to to the floor, Hawk climbed on the bed and waited for Nessa to finish her task. Lifting her body off the bed, Nessa walked over to the table and placed her comb on it, and walked back, there was a smile on her beautiful face, as she climbed on the bed, and lay next to her husband. Hawk immediately wrapped his muscled arms around her waist and pulled her into his possesive arms. Closing his eyes, Hawk inhaled the scent of her velvety skin. She smelled of lavender, and reminded him of the gardens when they were in full bloom.

"My love, I brought you some tea. William said that this blend of herbs is of unique quility found only on the highest mountains. He picked it Just for you because he knows you love tea." Hawk said, ignoring the guilt that wrapped around his heart.

"Kiss me Hawk, I don't care about tea right now." She said in a husky tone, but Hawk for the first time in his life, could not kiss her, nor did he want to make love to her. He was feeling deep regret for what he was about to do to her, and his body froze.

Pulling away from her, he jumped out of bed, and walked over to the table to get the tea. He must make her drink it before he goes insane. Grabbing the cup, he walked back, and sat on the edge of the bed.

"I promised William that you will drink this before it got cold. He said, and watched as Nessa pulled herself into a sitting position.

"Alright, give it to me and let's be done with this, I miss you Hawk, and need you desperatly." She said, as she took the cup out of his hand and brought it to her lips. It took three seconds for her to drink it, and she handed the empty cup back to him. "Thank you Hawk" she said, as she lay back down on the feathered mattress.

Hawk hoped the tea would take effect right away. Placing the empty cup on the table, he walked over to the fireplace and stoked the fire, watching the orange flames as they danced around the wood hungrily.

"Hawk, is something the matter?" Nessa asked him, her voice sounded worried, and Hawks heart twisted with pain.

"I'm fine Nessa." He told her, trying to hide the anxiety that was threatening to claim him.

Climbing on the bed, he lay next to her, and closed his eyes. This was even harder than he thought.

"Are you sure you're not feeling under the weather?" She asked, and her hand caressed his abs of steel, and drifted even lower than that to his shaft.

Hawk stiffened, and a huge dagger sliced through his heart. He could not make love to her right now, it was not possible, he thought, the guilt would be too much to bare if he touched her now.

"Sleep Nessa, it is late." He whispered gently in her ear.

Nessa's hand pulled away from him, "good night Hawk." She said, and he heard the disappointment in her voice as she turned her body around and gave him her back.

Hawk cursed under his breath, but there was nothing that he could do tonight. He waited until he heard her steady breathing, and quietly slipped off the bed. With a heavy heart, he picked up his kilt and wrapped it around his tapered waist and exited his chambers.