For Us

Chapter XIV

Just Stuff

The air chokes it,

The pressure builds on,

The heaviness inside it,

And everything around,

Makes it breakdown.

What is the meaning of this?

It pondered as it cried,

That's life,

It consoled the mind.

••••

Things were going on. Not smoothly and neither were they good, but they were going.

Namjoon heard her sometimes, be it a random thought of deciding to eat instant noodles or cookies, passing comments about her parents' fight and even thinking if everything was her fault, he heard them.

He tried to be as positive and optimistic as he can be with his late practices and song recordings. Sometimes he heard her complain and confide to herself in a different language which made him think that she might be phrasing sentences as if she was finally going to seek advice.

It didn't help much when she randomly curses herself for thinking too much and tells herself to get moving on and to ignore the problems or to momentarily forget them until the next wave of reality hits her.

He tried to be positive as she didn't think about harming herself.

One day he just collapsed on the floor after a vigorous dance routine when her stray thought reached him. It peaked his interest and he paid close attention to the thought.

Why would you say that our minds isn't suitable for becoming a doctor? You said that's cause it's been corrupted with theory and because of the bachelor's degree. So what are we to do if we can't see the end of our degrees or the path ahead? Would you suggest for us to ask ourselves? Cause I can't even decide on if I want to pursue a masters degree or get into teaching as my mom suggests? Or if I want to go into defense forces or... Or-

She didn't finish her thoughts and a dreadful feeling consumed Namjoon as he suddenly stood up and walked out the practice room.

It's so easy to give up...

He stilled when he heard that. He reached out to get a water bottle, waiting for her to finish her thought.

Shit! I forgot how many glasses of water I added in the rice cooker.

He had just took a sip when he chokes on it after listening to her. Waving a hand to say its nothing to the members, he picks up a hand towel and wipes his face.

She sure knows how to get distracted.