How To Steal A Heart

Break it

Chapter thirty-two: Break it (Jacob's POV)

"I understand that you're hurt and you want to be understanding, okay? I get that. But what do you mean by 'Julia was right?'" I asked in confusion. 

It was killing me to see what I was doing to her and how I was hurting her and I do love her, I just don't know if I love her like that. I love her how a friend loves a friend, I do have feelings for her, I like her, I just don't know if I've fallen in love with her yet. 

She threw her clothes in her suitcase while sniffing. "Before we came here, when we were in the backyard and the doorbell rang, it was Julia. She asked me if I was falling in love with you and I said yes because I knew I was. I did," she sniffed, "And she told me not to confess first because you've never fallen in love with someone, you've never said those words to someone so she said you wouldn't say it back and I ignored her. I thought she was wrong, I thought you would say it back, but you didn't. Turns out she was right. Got it?" she snapped at me while her breathing got heavier and few tears slipped out. 

"You listened to Julia instead of asking me?" I asked in disbelief. 

"She turned out to be right, Jacob. And I didn't tell you that she was the one at the door because that's your personal thing. It's none of my business if you have or haven't fallen in love with someone before," she huffed while wiping her face. "What matters here, is that I fell in love with you, but didn't fall in love with me," she said quietly. 

I stood there quietly while she folded her clothes and packed them in her suitcase. "Jacob," she sighed, "I don't know anything about relationships, right? But I do know that I don't wanna be in one if the person who I love doesn't love me," she breathed deeply. 

"Madison, don't," I breathed. 

"Why?" she stepped closer. 

"Because you mean everything to me. Just give me some time, please?" I asked. I don't think I've ever felt so pathetic. I'm asking for time to have the courage and to grow a fucking pair. 

"Time to what? Convince yourself that you do love me when you don't?" she questioned. "Jacob, you don't have to say it if you don't feel it right now. But if you don't feel it, we have to let each other go. We have to take a break," she sighed. 

"I don't want to take a break. I like being with you," I explained. 

"That's the difference. You like being with me but I love it," she ran her hand through her hair. 

"What happens if we take a break?" I asked, not wanting to know the answer. 

"We go back to how it was," she replied. 

"How it was? When?" I questioned. 

"When you moved in," she answered. 

I shook my head immediately. "No, Madison. I kept it with me for so long that I liked you because you were too worried about how my sister would react. And when you kissed me that day, I had never felt anything like it with anyone. I was so happy when you kissed me and when you went on that date with me... Madison, I'm not letting you go," I reasoned. 

"You have to," she looked at me, her eyes glimmering with tears. 

"Make me," I dared. 

"Jacob, if we don't love each other then where is this going?" she sighed. 

"I will fall in love with you, I know I will, but right now it's different. Things don't have to change. I'll say it when I say it, it's just three little words," I huffed.