FAR AWAY [JENLISA ]

06| R E M I N I S C E N T

Author's note:

This chapter may be triggering for those dealing with mental illness. More so, eating disorders.

Keep in mind that this is only an adaptation and not real life events that have taken place to the characters mentioned in the book.

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J E N N I E
P O V

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-Reminiscent-

/rɛmɪˈnɪs(ə)nt/
(def.) tending to remind one of something.
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-F I V E Y E A R S L A T E R-

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SEOUL, SOUTH KOREA
7:14 AM

"5 minutes, Jennie. 5 sweet minutes, and I'm leaving your ass." Irene enunciated from the outside of the bathroom door.

"No! Just a second. I'm almost. . ." I replied, drawing my left wing again, after I accidentally smudged the first one.

". . .done!"

Jeepers, at last. This 'being a girl' thing is difficult.

"Would you look at that. We're early for next year, asshole." Irene drawled.

"Better late than never. Bye Amy!" I greeted our helper.

"Take care, Jennie." She pulled her lips into a sweet, meaningful smile that reached her eyes.

My mother hired her to take care of Ella while I was in the recovery centre a few years ago.

Reaching my ultimate lowest, yet greatest goal, I finally lost half my body weight and ended up in the ER on a Monday morning after I purged the entire contents of Sunday's afternoon lunch until I coughed blood.

It felt sickly satisfying. Everyone thought that I was some fitness hero after I dropped weight so fast that my head spun, literally and figuratively.

I felt great each time someone came up to ask me for my diet secret.

Discipline and sacrifice I said.

I didn't lie. . .

Initially, it was discipline. Tortuous discipline and pushing myself further than my limits.

I sacrificed, pushing away each plate; each playdate; every classmate and the worst of all, my soulmate.

I sacrificed my will to live. I sacrificed my passions and interests for the sole purpose of being my mindset's idea of 'perfect'.

It did not matter how many kilograms or pounds I lost. I still felt like I needed to lose more.

I didn't want to slack. I didn't want to risk picking it right back up again.