Sincerely, Charli Day

Chapter 10

*A/N: i am so excited for this chapter...the eNdiNG...*

Non Hodgkin's Lymphoma: Also known as NHL, or sometimes just lymphoma, is a cancer that starts in white blood cells called lymphocytes, which are part of the body's immune system.

NHL is a term that's used for many different types of lymphoma that all share some of the same characteristics. NHL most often affects adults, but children can get it too.

That came straight out of the American Cancer Society book. But what does it mean to me? To Dad? To Leo? To Haisley? Even to Ryder, Zayden, Emery, and Marcheline?

It means time.

It means black. It means when.

It means be ready.

For Mom? To her it means collapsing one day to wake up two days later to find out she has cancer, beginning stage two without even knowing it.

To her it means constantly getting reminded Non Hodgkin's is the more 'common' lymphoma, but still not able to be cured.

To her it means loosing hair, chemo at least once a week, no visitors, progressively getting worse and worse, writing a will for your daughter who's only seventeen and a son who's barely thirteen.

To her it means loosing a life time with her children. Family. A lifetime well deserved.

To her it means soon.

❂ ❂ ❂

You would think your senior year of high school would be a little more interesting, but apparently it's not.

First semester is full of hell, writing college application after application. I've been drafting the same personal statement for the past two months, completely wanting to ignore it.

And so I have. That's an issue.

I haven't decided where I want to go to college yet. I want to stay close to home in case anything ever happens.

I can't help but feel guilty when I look at schools hours away. Schools like UCLA and University of Washington, which is more than just a few hours.

So I shove those options away. They're not for me.

The day's quiet and boring, the same as any other. Lunch breaks it though, resurfacing unwanted topics.

"So how was the checkup the other day?" Haisley asks, glancing up at me from her overly green salad.

Zayden straightens beside me, ready to listen. Ryder sets down his phone as Emery and Marcheline finally stop arguing. I shrug, not really sure how to respond to that.

I never do.

I lean against my seat, taking a sip of water. "It was okay. The doctor didn't say shit about anything, but we're hoping she'll be fine."

"Did he say anything about the throwing up? Or if it's getting better?"

I laugh bitterly, "He said the throwing up was a side effect, and nothing's working fast enough. I'm telling you, I've never seen Mom so put out and stomach sick. It was awful."

Haisley gnaws on her lip before getting up from her seat to wrap her arms around me tightly. "It's going to be okay, Char. Your Mom has always been a fighter."

I stare down at the sandwich in front of me. "You don't know that."

Zayden wraps his arms around the both of us, followed by Emery, then Marcheline, and finally Ryder. Until we're a huge heap in the middle of the cafeteria.