Ch. 7 - Down

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Song: Therapy by All Time Low
Words: 1333
Published: June 5th, 2020
Harley's POV

I don't really know what I feel anymore.

This week in itself has just been a bad week. It's Friday. At least this'll all be over soon. Starting Sunday, I will go on a two week long search for my mate for the sixth time since I turned twenty.

I don't have much hope anymore. My gamma, Calum, found his mate, Savvy, three years ago. My beta and delta are both mateless, but they haven't been waiting as long as I have. They don't need this as much as I do.

Calum will watch over the pack while we're gone. My beta, Keane, has always come with me. For the past two years my delta, Emmett, has been staying back. This year he'll be coming with. He says he has a good feeling.

I admire his enthusiasm.

I have to do a lot of work before and after the trip in order to not fall behind, but I think I bury myself a bit too much. I hate this time of year. It's a painful reminder to me of how sad and lonely I am. I have virtually everything anyone could ever want. The title, the power, the pack, the friends, the house, the money, anything I could ever need or want.

Correction, nearly anything.

I'm missing my mate. She is someone no one could ever buy.

The she-wolfs who say they love me don't really mean it. They love the idea. They love the money and power that comes with the title of being my mate. Not many can actually handle being the Luna Queen.

She'll complete me. Love me. Help me. Heal me. In return, I will do the same for her. I'll help her in any way I can, heal her from any past scars she may have, protect her from all of the worlds darkness, provide her with unconditional love and support. I'll do anything for her. Even give her the world, for goodness sake. All she'd have to do is say the world, and I'll be a puppet on her strings.

I just need to find her.

I struggle with loving people. I realized I have abandonment issues when I was twenty-two. I did therapy for a good two years, ending just last year. It was very frustrating at first. I didn't understand. I was young and naïve. Thankfully, I slowly got to the root of the problem. I've tried to patch things up with the people who gave me these problems, but they've been completely uncooperative.

The clock on my computer reads 6:08 P.M.

I woke up twelve hours and eight minutes ago and got straight to work. Got out of bed, dressed, and into the office. I haven't eaten yet and have been sitting at this desk for basically twelve hours straight.

There's a knock on my door.

"Come in," I say. My voice is scratchy. I should probably get some water.

"Hey, Harley," Keane greets, walking in. I just nod.

"You good?" he asks, sitting down in one of the chairs on the other side of my desk.

"Yeah . . ." I say, rubbing my eyes.

"Man, have you eaten today?" He also.

I shake my head. I sigh and lean back in my chair. Keane walks over and turns off my computer.

"That's enough work for today. Let's go downstairs, yeah?"

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