Reign (Riders of Apollo #1)

Chapter 39: Peyton Lennox

My heart breaks for Runner. I don't even know what he was shouting about, he just kept swearing and blaming it on some unknown being, I don't know if he's religious so he could be blaming a God or something. Either way, I could feel his pain.

So, I grab his arm and tug him from the crowded bar and out into my car. He's silent on the drive to the diner, a few sniffs and sighs but other than that he doesn't make any conversation. 

That's what freaks me out the most. He's the calmest but he's also the chattiest, bubbliest human being who's always trying to make other people feel better.

Though they do say that the happiest people are often the ones that are struggling.

I don't want to force him to explain his conundrum so I decide filling him with cake and ice cream with a side of pancakes and syrup will make him feel a little better. If he decides to chat then I'll be here to listen, otherwise we'll sit and chill out while putting on a hundred pounds.

He seems to feel a little better as we slip into the worn red booths. It's like something out of the eighties with the servers in poodle skirts and roller skates and bright red lipstick. The kitchen is open to you can see everything and all of their pastries and cakes are displayed at the counter. 

I came here my first night in town because I had nowhere to live and as this is place is open 24/7, it allowed me to fill up on food and coffee for a decent price while I decided on my next steps.

"Hey Bubbles." I greet the waitress that glides over, pad open with a gorgeous smile gracing her face. She's a little Puerto Rican lady who is around seventy years old and she makes the best pastries ever, she's worked here for over fifty years and when I asked her why she didn't leave - even though she has a college degree - she said that she loved it here and her husband made enough money for her to stay, so she did.

"Hello darling, is this your friend?" Her gentle hand reaches out and pats a sad Runner on the shoulder, his mouth curves into a little smile as he takes the motherly affection gratefully. Greeting her with soft Spanish and she swoons on her feet. "Oh, he is quite the charmer. What can I get you guys?"

"Your best cake, vanilla and chocolate ice cream and a stack of pancakes with syrup on the side please, my lovely Bubbles! We have a young man here to make happy so don't be stingy."

"Yes ma'am!" She salutes playfully and taps my cheek, gliding away gracefully towards to counter to input our order. I start playing with the cutlery on the table by rubbing the end of the fork on the end of the knife to make them magnetic then lifting the knife off the table.

"Boom, I am a magician." I look up at Runner and he seems amused so at least this is working as best as it can. Bubbles and her son Ricardo bring over an abundance of cake and I look at it with undisguised glee. She even brought us cannoli and a freaking six pack of doughnuts. 

Right, everyone else go home, Bubbles has won the award for best human to grace this planet.

I thank her a load of times and pay her an extra fifty because I love her. She won't notice for a while and she'll try and give it back because she's sweet like that and then we'll argue and I'll win. It's just tradition for us.

"Okay, you have to try the red velvet, it is Heaven on Earth."

"I'm gay." He spits the words out like they're on fire and I feel a little surprised. I didn't really peg him as gay though I guess I haven't met many people that swing that way and I - annoyingly and rudely - use stereotypes to define people. He definitely doesn't fit that stereotype.

"Okay, you still have to try the cake though." I laugh and slice the cake in half, before wiping some cream on his nose.

"Wait, you're not mad or disgusted or anything?" He leans forward with his eyes wide and he looks like a puppy that's waiting to get kicked.

"No, of course not, you're my best friend Runner. You're still the same person. The only thing I hate about you is the fact that you only like vanilla ice cream."

"Hey, it's the best ice cream."

"Sure and cardboard is the best food." He gasps and lobs a strawberry at me which I pick up off the table and eat. "Are you feeling better?"

"This is nice and I like being able to sit and relax. The guys know I'm gay it just feels different outside of the clubhouse. I was angry over a guy earlier."

"I gathered it was something like that, I didn't want to push or anything." He squeezes my hand and sticks some vanilla ice cream in his mouth, smirking when I grimace.

"He's still in the closet, which isn't the fucking problem, he uses me like a booty call and every time I go running to him like this is the time that it'll change. That he'll choose me for once in his goddamn life rather than his goddamn ego. But all I can do is sit back and let him walk all over me. I'm in love with the asshole and I know I can't put this pressure on him. It just hurts."

"Is he younger than you?" Runner is twenty seven and turns twenty eight next month so I would expect him to go for someone around his age. He's mature and strong, he knows what he wants and I doubt he'd be so in deep with someone who perhaps isn't like that.

"He's twenty one. I figured with his job, he'd be more mature and whatever, I guess I thought too much of him and it's biting me in the ass now. God, Savvy, what I'd give to have a functional relationship like yours and Reign's."

"I'm sorry, Runner. Maybe you should give each other some space, if he's not ready to admit who he is yet then it's safe to assume that it might be a little longer. To me, it sounds a little like you're an experiment, he's trying to figure himself out and, while he's allowed to do that, he shouldn't be using you to do it. If you love him and he's not ready for that, you might just scare him away."

"I know that, I do. He's so young and adventurous and it's not fair of me to demand more from him than he can give. I was in his shoes ten years ago, I just forget about everything when I see him. The age doesn't matter, the fact that he is using me just doesn't matter. I love him, I do, and for that reason I need to stop being an overbearing dick that keeps trying to force something that doesn't seem to be working."

"Maybe in the future it might work, but if it's hurting you this much, it is not healthy."

"I know. I'm grateful for you, Sav."

"I'm grateful for you too. Now eat your cake, don't disrespect Bubbles by ignoring her offering."

We don't get back to the clubhouse until four in the morning, having been sat in that booth for five hours fucking about. I ate so much and I brought some home which I was able to wedge into Runner's mini fridge so that no one can eat it but us.

I feel a lot closer to him now and I love him so much more than I did before. He's such a fucking beautiful human being inside and out and if I'm honest, after the lengthy chat with him I don't feel the episode coming anymore. Maybe for once, I might go without it.

I slip into bed beside Roman in one of his t-shirts and accept his embrace as he rolls over to cuddle me into him. 

God, he is so cute.