Chapterish 14

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The hike is –well –a hike. Yoga keeps me tuned, but not in shape enough for this type of strenuous outdoorsy excursion. Brooks and Brody are at the head of the group, heading in the direction of the lake. All I see is another hill to climb. On the plus side, struggling against all the fresh air whipping into my face is requires a lot of exertion. I'm nice and sweaty and can feel how clammy my camisole is against my back.

An hour later we peak at the crest of the mountain. Its flat plateau overlooks the valley and forest below. I'm reminded of the top of a chairlift. Everything looks like odd patches thrown together, a grid of snow-covered fields, ribbons of trees and toy houses. Even the mabin looks miniature, bits and pieces of its hidden roof visible through the pines.

"Let's break here," Brooks announces to the group.

Everyone sighs with relief and spreads out to sit on logs or lean against the trees. Travis and Nate unzip their coats to cool down. I watch Brooks slide the bag down his shoulder and rest it on the ground, throwing his head back laughing with Nate. He looks hot and sweaty and like a winter lumberjack in his element.

I think back to Summer Brooks –to his wavy hair like he just stepped out of the ocean –to the taste of salt on his tan skin –to his red swimsuit trunks of the floor of a beachside cabana.

My mind TV flickers and rave music plays in my ears. I see Brooks and I walking down a snowy cobblestone street. I feel him inside me with my back pressed against a wall on the terrace.

Winter Brooks ain't bad.

My cheeks prickle with heat and I too unzip my jacket to cool down. Focus, Em.

I wander across the flat mountaintop like my legs can somehow carry me farther away from more inappropriate thoughts of Brooks. The wind howls at my back as my boots crunch down on fresh icy snow. I can see the lake below us from this side. Its' crystalized surface stretches across the valley to the mountain on the other side.

Wet cold seeps through my socks and I looks down, realize how submerged in the snow my feet really are. I lift my leg too high, overcompensating. My laces are undone.

"Bathroom break?"

"Shit!" I curse, under my breath –almost jumping out of my skin.

"So yes?" Alex stands next to me, his head cocked with a crooked smile.

"What, no!" I laugh. "Tying my boot, thanks."

I stand so we are almost face-to-face. Looking past him, I see everyone else's heads still at the hilltop.

"Came to get you. Breaks over," he says, shrugging.

"I'm ready."

Alex and I navigate our way through fresh snow, leaving messy footprints behind us. I steal a glance at him, aware this is the first time we've been alone really since IT. I focus on the old lift tickets hanging from his black ski jacket. Alex looks over at me and catches me staring. Say something, idiot.

"I like Whit," I blurt out. Is it the truth?

"Yea she's something else. Can't believe it's been six months already," Alex says, smiling more to himself than me.

"That's gotta be a personal record," I tease.

"You're one to talk." He pulls my hat down over eyes, his laugh throaty.

"Hey!" I try to sound offended.

"Bout time you guys got back together. I was starting to worry," Alex grins.

I just roll my eyes at him and keep walking on, laughing beside him. Leave it to Alex to act like nothing ever happened between us and then tease me for taking so long to get back together with Brooks.

"You guys are good together, really," he utters. I peer up at him and draw my lips into a straight line like I'm trying to decide if he's serious. Alex rolls his eyes at me. "Yes, I mean it. You two are like endgame."

"Ha-ha!" I can't help but scoff/laugh in his face. "Who says endgame?"

"Shut up and take the compliment."

"Is it?" I ask, lifting only one eyebrow, skeptical. "A compliment?"

"Sure," he answers matter-of-factly. "You're goals, ya know? Maybe sometimes it sucks, but it's like nothing gets in the way of you two."

I'm in utter shock at how authentic this convo is right now, no lie. Like, he gets it. Still wondering how he can say all this knowing he got very much in the way only a few months ago.

"Nothing?" I ask, coy.

"Wait," he says, drawing up a hand. "I'm getting a nice picture. You, naked."

"HEY!" I laugh, swatting his arm away.

We're almost upon the clearing and I can smell Cam's perfume wafting on the wind. Scent: Disgust.

"I'm only messin'," Alex laughs. "In all honesty, I think everything that happened led you guys here. So who can really complain?"

"Insightful," I smirk.

"I thought so." Alex says over his shoulder as he pulls ahead in the direction of Whit.

"Bae." Brooks does his best Brody impression when I rejoin them.

I don't say anything, but instead push up on my boots' toes and peck his lips. My hands cross behind his neck and I fondle his nub of a man pony. His breath tickles when he laughs against me.

"Lake or turn around?" Brody asks, looking down the front side of the slope.

Everyone mumbles whatever or they don't care and fifteen minutes later we are left with an inconclusive response. In the end we decide to turn back around. It's already getting dark and we are at least an hour and a half into the trail. Deep blue stains the sky above; the light on the horizon shrinks as we hike farther away. Forgot the sun sets at like 4 PM in winter.

The walk back is peaceful and quiet. Everyone is clinging to the last bits of attentiveness before their exhaustion consumes them. Brooks walks beside me, hand looped through mine. We share the thermos of now lukewarm coffee and steal a few kisses when no one else is looking. Lauren and Brody walk in front of us, moving in sync like they're planning their steps together.

I smile to myself thinking that for the first time in a while –maybe ever –Brooks and I might give them a run for their money.

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