Chapter 35-'Soka

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Soon you were hovering over Onderon, no idea where to go.

"So tell me now," Kaiden said.
"About what?" You asked.
"Why you hate Lux,"
"I can't," you said. "Not yet."
"Why not?" Kaiden kept on pressing you.
"Because I can't!" You said a little louder than you meant to. "It's just, you wouldn't understand."

Kaiden looked at you like you were crazy.
"What wouldn't I understand?" He asked. "Did he like kill someone, or something?"
"No, definitely not," you said. "He doesn't have the guts to do that."
"Then why?"Kaiden asked again.
"Because I already told you, remember?" You said.
"Yeah, but Ahsoka can kiss whoever she wants, you can't tell her who she can or can't kiss," Kaiden pointed out.

You shook your head.
"You don't know what I know,"
"Then tell me!" Kaiden said. "What keeps on hurting you?"
"Why do you care?" You asked raising your voice a little. "Why should I tell you?  You're an ex-Sith that I met like three days ago!"
"I'm your brother for god sake!" Kaiden yelled. "What are you so afraid of?"

You looked at him and froze.
"Nothing can scare me anymore," you said. "Not after that night."
"Will you tell me what's bothering you then?" He asked.
"She's bothering me," you said. "Ahsoka is bothering me."
"How?" Kaiden asked. "She's dea—"

You jumped up and slammed into him pushing him into the wall.
"Finish that sentence," you growled. "I dare you."
"Get off me," Kaiden used the force to push you across the ship.
"Don't ever say her name again," you threatened, a hand on your lightsaber.

Kaiden glared at you, his hand was on his lightsaber as if he was challenging you to use yours.
"One word," he said slowly, venom lacing his every word. "Ahsoka."
You jumped across the ship and punched Kaiden in the gut. He doubled over, but ran headfirst into your stomach knocking you over.

You jumped up and raised your hands ready to pound the asshole with only your fists, but a familiar feeling caused you to freeze in your tracks.
"Stop," a familiar voice said. "Don't do this because you miss me."

Your fist fell to your side and you dropped to your knees.
"'Soka?" You whispered into the silence. "Are you here?"
"I'm just a vision," Ahsoka's voice could be heard clearly.
"I'm sorry," you sobbed. "I love you."
"I love you too (y/n)," she said. "Don't let your anger get into your head."

You were about to say something else to her, but you paused when you felt her presence slip away. She was gone.
"That must mean she's alive," you jumped into a seat and looked at the navicomputer. "Where would she be?"
"Excuse me," Kaiden said standing up. "But you have a lot of explaining to do."
"Shit," you muttered. "You heard me?"
"What the hell was that all about?" He asked. "And why didn't you kill me when you had the option?"

"Well, I might as well tell you," you said. "Come sit."
You and Kaiden sat back down in your seats and her turned to you.
"Finally," he said. "Now tell me."
"So," you took a deep breath. "Me and Ahsoka were really good friends."
"Yeah I know that," Kaiden said.
"No, like really good friends," you emphasized. "We were so close that we actually started, um, dating when we were fifteen."

Kaiden looked at you shocked.
"So you guys dated behind the Jedi Council's back?"
"Yeah, and nobody knew except for Bo-Katan Kryze a Mandalorian 'cause I told her, and Padmé Amidala, because she found out herself," you explained. "So Ahsoka went on a mission with Lux, and I was there undercover as a Death Watch member, and he kissed her, right in front of me."
"But he didn't know right?" Kaiden pointed out. "So why would he know not to kiss her."

You looked at him, new thoughts swirling around your brain.
"But it still was without her consent," you said. "He has no right to kiss her."
"Alright," Kaiden said. "I'm not going to argue with you, my stomach wouldn't appreciate it."
"That's a compliment," you smiled.

"Eh," he shrugged. "how did you guys start dating anyways?"
"Our dad shot me," you said.
"What the f-" (hey Kaiden! This is a PG-13 book, no f-words!) (I'm so sorry about that)

"Yeah, when he was alive, he shot me after I was protecting the old Duchess of Mandalore," you said. "Ahsoka stayed with me while I thought I was dying in the medbay, and I told her how I felt and she kissed me.  Turned out, I was fine."
"Sounds sweet," Kaiden smirked.
"Seriously?" You raised your eyebrows at him.
"Sorry," Kaiden smiled. "How long did you guys last?"
"About a year and a half, maybe more, maybe less," you said. "She broke up with me when we were sixteen and she left the Order, a year later we got back together, that was a few weeks ago."
"Oh," Kaiden said. "I have one more question."
"Fire away," you shrugged. "I'm already telling you my deep, dark secrets."

"You could've killed me a few minutes ago, why didn't you?"
"Ahsoka," you said slumping down in your seat. "She did this right before I almost killed Lux. She and I have a weird bond through the force, and we can almost talk to each other through it, or appear where the other person is."

"You almost killed Lux?" Kaiden asked with horror.
"Uh, yeah," you said. "He told me that I didn't have to be so protective over her because she liked him, so I beat the crap out of him, but right before I finished him, she appeared in my head, reminding me how much she loved me."

"I wish I could've had someone like that," Kaiden said. "She sounds amazing."
"She honestly was," you agreed.
"Too bad I can't meet her," Kaiden shook his head.

"Don't say that too soon," you said. "Ahsoka was only able to talk to me with Lux because she was alive and had a force vision, which means..."
"Ahsoka could still be alive!" Kaiden finished your sentence.

You nodded in agreement.
"Okay we have to find her," Kaiden said.
"Let's go," you said.
"Where would she be?" he asked.
"I have a few ideas," you smiled, taking control of the ship. "Don't worry 'Soka, I'll see you soon."

So I'm like super pissed cause I had a really good version of this but then it deleted and I couldn't get it back, but I rewrote it, so if parts seem rushed, that's why. Also I won't go through the entire 14 years between Clone Wars and Rebels, I'll skip most of it. Thanks!
-Snips

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