40. Listen

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"Elijah cheated on me."

"Oh my gosh!"

"He's having a baby with someone else."

There was no time to pause, "Holy shit Rain."

"When we were in Palm Springs I slept with his uncle."

"Wait what?"

"His uncle is Professor Rivera."

The food fell completely out of Laleh's mouth, slamming her hands down onto the dining table to stop her from choking. She couldn't contain her surprise, startled by the revelation. "That was the biggest plot twist ever, Professor Rivera? I can't believe it!" She hollered, clearly more than amazed at what the calm girl across her was telling her. "The asshole that failed me last year? I'll give it to him, he's hot but he's a massive prick."

Rainy lifted her shoulders in a dismissive shrug, poking at her spaghetti with her fork. "His name's Silver, he's thirty years old. And a bigger ass when he's not teaching."

Laleh was completely speechless, studying her sulking friend as she pushed her chair out. "Rainy..." She t'sked in disappointment, getting up from her seat and crossing the space between them. "Why didn't you tell me?"

There was no judgement in her words, she was simply at a loss.

"Because I thought I had it under control," Rainy admitted, tears brimming in her eyes. There was a faint sniffle before the light whimpers escaped her. "B-But now I feel more crappy than I did before and I really need someone to listen. I told Eli everything."

Arms wrapped around her tightly, holding her close as she let it out. Her body trembled the more she bawled, the silent breakdown was not something that was uncommon.

The caressing motions on her back made her feel relatively better, she had been on edge all day and it was obvious something was on her mind. After sitting through a long lecture where she could only focus on his voice proved to be harder than she had comprehended it'd be.

"There must be something more if you're this upset. The last time you cried into your food was when your pet hamster died in the seventh grade. I remember that backyard funeral so well. What was her name again? Gigi?"

"Fiji and she was a guinea pig." She sulked.

"May she rest in pieces." The play on the words didn't go unnoticed by the broken girl. Clearly, the memory was still touchy as she shot the insensitive girl a glare.

Pulling out of the hug, a chair pulled next to Rainy and tissues were shoved into her hand. She sniffled returning back to the topic at hand, wiping her runny nose with the crumbled tissues. "I spoke to Silver."

She didn't know how to say it without her breath hitching and the words getting stuck in her throat. "He told me he loved me."

Laleh rose a thick brow, astonished.

Should that not have been good news?

"But?" She mustered up, sensing the catch approaching, and she was correct.

An amused smile bordered onto the curly-haired girl's lips, she gave her a shrug. "But it's not I wanted to hear."

All she wanted was someone to comfort her, and listen. And she knew she was in a safe space where she could let everything out without being judged.

"Besides, I think he was just saying that because I was angry crying. Why would he be in love with me?" She pathetically laughed, her nose and cheeks tinted with redness. "I'm Rainy."

Laleh pursed her lips at the self-deprecating words. If there was one thing that was a lie, it was the disbelief that anyone could fall in love with Rainy Love.

It was impossible to not fall in love her.

"Exactly you're Rainy, need I remind you of every guy that has ever spoken to you?" She chastised, batting her arm when the sniffles began to get noisier. "Now if you had said hate then I'd understand the confusion. But no, everyone loves you Rain, including me."

"You have to say that, you're my best friend."

"-Well that's true but that's not why I said it. I'm serious, this isn't like you. When have you ever cried over a guy? Now I know that you know your worth so what's really the problem?"

This isn't what she cried over.

She usually felt awful when she thought about substantial issues like injustice or global problems, not something as insignificant as a man confessing his love for her.

But then she thought about it again, and her heart felt tight against her chest. She didn't want to be affected by his words but it was hard not to be when it had appeared out of nowhere.

Did she love him?

Rainy hadn't thought about how she felt towards the complicated professor. She knew she was fiery and impulsive; she also had a difficult time dealing with jealously. She undoubtedly did not want to see him with anyone else, at least not in front of her.

"I thought it was just sex, and that's what it was at first. Sex. But then I wanted to see him, to - talk. I didn't care about the sex as much, I still don't. I-I don't know if what I feel is love." She confessed, brows knitting together in frustration.

"And that's okay, you don't need to rush anything."

Rainy didn't want to rush, that was her biggest fear. She knew if she rushed then the same cycle would start up again.

"I don't want to cry anymore, I don't even want to be sad. I want to forget about it, I just want to feel like myself again." She sighed, reaching the conclusion that if she had cried herself out. She didn't want to sit there and let her confidence wither away.

Laleh thought about it for a long few minutes before it hit her. "Dinner at The Den, and then Electric?"

The thought of going to their favourite nightclub was exactly what she wanted to do. She wanted an evening where she could let loose and enjoy herself.

That was exactly what she wanted to do.

Rainy nodded, the ghost of a smile appearing on her face. "That sounds like a perfect plan."

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