10) Foreplay

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         Yas.

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                    “Coming your way, Scar-lay!”

            Samantha, my blue-eyed workmate and new gym buddy of about three weeks, came rollerblading around the counter at full speed. She whooshed past me, dirty blonde hair a blur.

        We both wore our amazing work uniform of a neon yellow shirt, torn boyfriend jeans, and a high pony tail.  

        She swatted my ponytail as she rolled by. “Hey, hot stuff!” 

        “Hey, Sammy!” I went back to dolloping ice cream into my root beer float, when my coworker rolled past me again and gave my ass a hard smack. “Ouch!”

           

             “So, clubbing tomorrow night?” Sam asked as she slid by me towards the coffee machine, wiggling her eyebrows. “We both clearly need to get laid. You especially!”

            I gave her a long look. “Oh, you think so, huh?”

        “Yes, you need a boyfriend; preferably a tall, dark, and brooding guy with a tight ass. The kind of ass that you dig your nails in during sex and you could look at for days...” She looked away dreamily, sighing. “Yes…that would be perfect for you… And me. Definitely me!”

            Sam was one of a kind.

            “I don’t know about clubbing….” I started.

        “Listen, you need a fuck boy, bad. We’ve been working our tails off and you’ve had “the look” on your face for weeks.”

            “What look?!”

            “The ‘help me, Sam, I was fucked over and now I need to be fucked in the butt’ look,” she said, mocking my voice.

            I frowned.

        “Also, if you get a guy before me, which you probably will because I’ve been told I’m unapproachable and intimidating to the male species, I need to live vicariously through you, so you better fuck constantly. Like rabbits.” She filled a mug with coffee. “Rabbits,” she repeated, staring me dead in the eyes.

        I looked up at the ceiling, shaking my head slowly as if God could see me. He’d surely be laughing, too. Sam had perfectly described Ferro, ass and all.

        “I’ve recently been equally as unapproachable and intimidating to the male species, so we’re pretty much on the same platform right now,” I said.

        “True---oh, shit-cakes!” Sam looked over her shoulder at one of her tables. “With all this frantic Christmas shoppers stopping to eat, I forgot about table five. Do you think you could bring this coffee to a usual customer at table fifteen?” She quickly handed me the coffee. “The one with the black fedora and the angry face?”

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