Broken But Yours

11. One hell of a night-I

Amber's P.O.V.:

It was the evening of the next day. I was lazily scrolling through my Instagram on my phone and randomly double-tapping on the photos of my friends. People were enjoying their weekend in the best ways possible but I didn't envy them at all because whatever happened last night was enough of an excitement aka adventure for me for the entire weekend. I wasn't in the mood to do anything exciting anymore.

I remember how sleepless I was last night. I didn't even get much sleep. My mind visited the kiss from the club time and again. I tried doing midnight meditation, inhaling and exhaling deeply multiple times, I danced on 'all the single' ladies for god knows how long in the middle of the night but sleep wasn't in my favor. Not at all.

I mean what is wrong with me and most importantly, what is wrong with Chris?

He cleared it out three years ago already that he has no feelings for me and will never accept my feelings for him then why in the world is he doing all this?

I swear, Chris is gonna take me down to a mental asylum someday if he's gonna keep doing stuffs like that.

And what's with him getting furious everytime a guy touches me or comes closer to me?

And Paul even isn't straight guy for heaven's sake.

I need to ask Chris to either explain to me everything or simply let of this behaviour of his.

Yeah, right. As if you've got the gut to speak in front of him. Have you already forgotten how you went to ask him about the employees swapping matter and ended up handing him your diet plan to get it signed. You don't seem to be you when you are in front of him. My conscience mocked.

Okay, fine. But that was just one time.

And what about the time when you embarrassed yourself in front of him in the elevator. Put a pillow on your chest? Who says that to her boss? My conscience mocked again.

That was because I wasn't thinking much. I mean because I was thinking way too much that I didn't realize I was blurting out those words loudly. I reasoned.

Yeah, keep saying that to yourself, Amber. My conscience taunted.

How much I deny it but the truth is that he still has the same effect on me as he had three years ago. I can't seem to control myself and my emotions when I am in front of him. It's like I go from stage 1 of normal level to the stage 100 of the abnormality.

God! I am such a mess and he is such a silent hottie. And eyes are too sexy to be real. And his broad chest...he's a fitness junkie. I wish I could move my hands over his well toned abs and rock-like hard chest.

What's wrong with you, Amber? You're getting horny already. My conscience questioned.

Urgghhhhhhh! I shook my head rigorously to get these thoughts out of my head.

"Thinking about your future babies with Mr. Collins?" Adelaide asked as she sat beside me on the sofa.

"What? Where did that come from?" I asked, looking at her in amaze.

"You've been thinking about him all the time." she said as if stating an obvious fact.

"How do you know that I have been thinking about him?" I asked, surprised.

"Amber, haven't you noticed yet that everytime you're in your deep thoughts, you speak out your thoughts loudly. " she said, looking at me.

What the hell! How did I not notice that thing about me ever? And why did no one ever told me about it?