I R I S

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I was scared to leave Nathaniel alone even if it was for a couple minutes, I didn't want to be away from him but I needed air

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I was scared to leave Nathaniel alone even if it was for a couple minutes, I didn't want to be away from him but I needed air. I wrapped a blanket around me and walked out to the balcony. The fresh air brushed against my cheeks, I took in the view of the cities lights. I glanced down at my ring, yellow sapphire happens to be my favorite diamond.

"It's beautiful out tonight." Ryan stood next to me, looking out at the city just as I.

"Yea."

"I have to apologize for something." Ryan says.

I turned around and cocked my eyebrow up. Now looking at Ryan, I'm most definitely confused about my feelings for him.

"Every obstacle you've faced, I'd think you wouldn't over come it." Ryan faced me completely, so did I. He ran his hand over his chin before lowering his hand back to his side. "You just did."

I turned my head, facing away from him. "I'm not that strong..." I whispered.

"You are stronger then what you give yourself credit for." Ryan said so seriously. Ryan has always had this skill on making me feel better with just his words, not a lot of people can do that,

"Carter gave me back my freedom, even got a cool tattoo out of it." Ryan showed off his tattoo on his arm which said 'Omertà'. Code of silence.

My fingers browsed it, a smile appeared on my lips.

"I want you to come with me." Ryan's says. I pulled my hands back to my side. Ryan then pulled them into his, he raised them just below his mouth. "Isabella, just think about it. We can leave all of this behind, move to Hawaii, start a family together. I don't care if Nathaniel isn't mine, I'll love him like he's my own. We'll finally get peace."

My eyes darted to his. I thought about what he just said, if I leave with Ryan then I'll have a normal life without being in danger, without worrying who might die next but I'll never see Carter again. It's either Ryan or Carter, I can't have it both ways. I heard Gracies voice in the back of my head, 'it's time, bunny.'

"My whole life I've been in love with my little sister's best friend."

I lowered our hands and rubbed circles on his wrist with my thumb.

"You're not coming." Ryan says the answer before I could.

I nodded my head. "I care for you Ryan, I swear I do but.."

"You love him." Ryan finished my sentence before I could.

I saw the pain in his eyes, it makes me feel horrible that I'm the one who caused it.

I nodded my head once again. he took a step closer to me, his breath fanned against my cheeks. His thumb ran across my cheek, I closed my eyes before reopening them.

"I can't lie and say I'm happy. I love you Bunny, I always will. You were my first love, my first everything."

"I know. You were too." I say.

"That little boy in there is lucky, he has an amazing mother and father who love him very much." Ryan chuckles softly.

I chuckle also before going on my tippy toes, I gently kiss his cheek.

"Take care, Ryan." I whispered.

"Bye, Isabella."

Ryan walks the opposite direction of me, out the door. I glanced up at the sky, the stars were brighter then the sun that once stood up a couple hours ago. I felt like Grace was watching me with a smile, like she was happy her brother was finally getting away from all of this. I couldn't agree with her more.

It started to get cold, I headed inside. I closed the sliding door making sure to lock it, when I turned around I seen Carter in the bathroom trying to wipe his cuts.

I walked over to him, he seemed surprised to see me. "Shouldn't you be with Ryan, Bunny?" He asks.

"If you want to be with him, I can't stop you but all I ask of you is to let me have a relationship with my son."

I looked at him, studying if he was telling the truth. Did he really think, I would go with Ryan?

"Carter, I did not just kill your mother for me to have a family with someone else"  I said.

Carter fell silent before responding.

"I was praying you didn't, seems like god answered my prayers." Carter smiles.

I smile back and rolled my eyes before grabbing his wrist, I sat him on the toilet and took the cloth from his hand and carefully dipped it in alcohol before gently wiping his cuts. Carter was pretty quiet as he scans over my body, like his trying to let me think, to make sure this is what I want.

I've never been so sure before, Carter is what I want.

Earlier when my mom seen us kiss, I feel like she didn't say anything because she knew all along in a really strange way. I wish Carter and I met under different circumstances but we didn't and I accepted that. I stopped cleaning his wounds and lowered my hand against his bare torso.

"You're a horrible man, you kill, you hurt, you ruin..yet I can't help to feel most alive with you." His eyes slowly found mine, I was out of breath after my speech. "I love you Carter, it's always going to be you, no matter who you kill, no matter who you hurt, I'm always going to love you."

He stayed quiet which scared me a bit, why wasn't he responding? No, he loves me. It looked like he was struggling as his chest started heaving up and down. He calmed himself down, before holding my little hand into his big one.

"Isabella, that ring around your finger isn't just any ring. It was my sister's, from her first boyfriend. She loved him more then life itself, she told me when I find a girl who I feel the same way about, give her that ring." He says.

"Catalina was just like you, maybe that's why I was so cruel to you in the beginning." He says. "I believe she brought you in my life to show me that love isn't just a word, and what my parents had wasn't love but instead abuse." He stares deep inside my eyes without a hint of coldness, his words were laced with the truth.

"I was scared of letting you in because I knew I'd end up falling for you and in my line of business, it's dangerous to love someone but I'd risk everything for you and Nate." He looked up at me.

"Moral of the story, I've loved you for a very, very long time.."

A smile appeared on my lips, my arms softly wrapped around his neck. Carter's arms circled around the small of my waist. It was peaceful in his arms, I felt safe and loved.

The word devil never defined him, love defines him. I feel total bliss with my life, I have everything I've ever wanted and much more but there was still one thing I was worried about.

Carter and I both remained in each other's arms as we glanced at Nathaniel, who was sleeping peacefully with his brown hair sprawled across his face.

Nathaniel's future scared me. There's only one question ringing in my head and probably Carter's too.

Why the fuck did she call Nathaniel, reaper?

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