Fade in to the fan in front of the base, which the Robot Army (eventually) walks past
Robot Army: Charge.
O'Malley: Hu hu hoh, for God's sake. Will you hurry up! Lopez, I'm disappointed in your work. These minions are much too slow.
Lopez: Creo que esta moviéndro muy bien.
Caption: I think they are moving along nicely.
O'Malley: You fool! You don't even have legs, and you still got up here faster than them!
Lopez: Usted es los cerebros en esta operación. Yo no mas soy el músculo.
Caption: Hey, you're the brains in this operation. I'm just the brawn.
Doc: They may be slow, but their posture is excellent!
O'Malley: Huhhg...
Doc: A for effort, Lopez!
Cut to Sarge
Sarge: I think they're distracted. Let's use this chance to slip away.
Simmons: Great idea, Sir. I have a lock on the distress signal. We can head right for it.
Sarge: Good thinking Simmons. Everybody in the jeep.
Simmons: Shotgun!
Grif: Shotgun! Fuck.
Donut: Shotgun's lap!
Simmons: Fuck!
Sarge: There's just no room for four people. Someone will have to jog alongside. Grif?
Grif: Jog? What's that?
Simmons: It's like running slowly, dear God you don't know what jogging means?
Grif: Yeah, you lost me at running. Sorry, it's not in my contract.
Donut: Oh, don't worry, I'll do it. Just give me one second while I put my jogging shorts on.
Grif: Wait. I wanna reconsider.
Donut: Who wants to hold my ankles while I stretch out my hammies?
Sarge: Noone's fallin' for that twice, Donut.
Cut to Tex peering out a window at the Robot Army
Tex: Alright, I think I can take 'em. I just need a better weapon.
Tucker: Want me to help you find one?
Tex: Mm, why don't you just give me your sword?
Tucker: No way, I can see right through your little ploy. You just want me to give you the sword.
Tex: That's what I just said.
Tucker: Yeah, but it's the way you said it.
Tex: You know, it's a good thing that that sword doesn't run on brainpower. Oh my God, Tucker, look! Hot chicks.
Tucker: Nice try, you just want me to turn around so you can knock me out and take the sword.
Tex: Now the hot girls are makin' out.
Tucker: Okay, that's worth the risk. (turns around) Eauhw, crap.
Tex hits Tucker from behind and knocks him out, just like she planned
Cut to Caboose talking with Andy... the bomb
Caboose: Just stay calm Andy... everything will be fine.
Andy: I'm okay, really. I like explosions. You on the other hand look a little nervous.
Caboose: You know, I always get a little nervous during battles. ...I think it's 'cause we never win.
YOU ARE READING
Red vs Blue (Male OC Insert) [Being heavily overhauled]
FanfictionYou were one of the first freelancers and one of the best you could never fill a mission no matter what happens you always succeed no matter who you fight you always come out on top. You've lost a lot of people you care about in your life along with...
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