After Her Last Straw (Dream Series #1)

Chapter 6

Chapter 6: Sick
Zanashi

Three days before mockboard, I found it hard to review the remaining topics included in the exam. Bago pa ang araw na ito, I was always in the library before and after class but for the remaining three days, I could not continue this routine anymore. 

"Anak, paabot nga ng tubig.."

I immediately left my books to get some warm water. Inalalayan ko si Papa sa pag-upo at pag-inom bago ko siya muling inalalayan sa paghiga.

"Kumain ka, papa, ha? Limang minuto na lang po siguro'y maluluto na ang lugaw. Bumili na rin ako ng gamot kanina. Inumin niyo lang 'pag nagkaroon na po ng laman ang tiyan niyo."

"Sige.. salamat, anak. Ipagpatuloy mo na ang ginagawa mo," nanghihina niyang sabi sabay pikit.

Nagkasakit si Papa tatlong araw bago ang mockboard. Hindi sakitin si Papa. Bihira lang dapuan ng lagnat. Kung dapuan man, hindi nanghihina nang todo tulad na lang ng panghihina niya ngayon.

It all started on tuesday evening when he got home from work. Basang-basa siya ng ulan.. at lasing.

Nagwala siya buong gabi samantalang nagkulong ako sa kwarto ko. His behaviour screams misery and sadness. He probably looked like he had gone with so much problems just within a day. The urge to stop and console him was eating my sanity.

I badly wanted to do it but staying inside my bedroom when he's drunk has always been his reminder to me. I complied because I knew what he's capable of when he's drunk. He becomes so violent and unconscious with his actions.

Lasing si Papa nang una niya akong pagbuhatan ng kamay.

Hindi.. ko gustong maalala pa ang bagay na iyon, at kahit alalahanin ko man ay 'di pa rin bumibigay ang utak ko. Wala akong maramdaman sa mga oras na iyon kundi sakit at takot. Madilim kapag inaalala ko. Tanging ang imahe ko lang na nakasalampak sa sahig at ni Papa na hinihila ang buhok ko ang nakikita ko.

Hindi ko gustong isipin ang mga pwedeng mangyari kung hindi lang dumating ang mga katrabaho ni Papa.

Hingi nang hingi ng sorry si Papa kinabukasan nang makita ang mga pasang natamo ko. Paulit-ulit niyang hinahawakan ang kamay ko, hinahalikan ang noo ko, at pinagmamasdan ang kalagayan ko habang patuloy na umiiyak.

Hindi ako nagtanim ng sama ng loob. Somehow, I understood where he's going from. He's drunk and everyone can do crazy things when drunk. Nauunang gumalaw ang katawan at hindi napapairal ang pag-iisip.

"Aphra! Buksan mo 'to! Ano ba! Bakit walang pagkain? Buksan mo nga 'to!"

My left hand tried to block my ear while I squeezed my pillow with my right hand, pouring out all my pain, terror, and anguish at once. Every passing second was like hell to me.

I hate it. I hate this. I hate the fact that I could not face my father right now because he might throw his hands at me. I hate that I could not help him with his problem right now because he might slap me. I hate that I could not hug him. I hate that I could not stay by his side. I hate that I could not control him and lift him up during his darkest time. I hate this!

Pagsapit ng umaga, inaapoy siya ng lagnat. He was so stubborn to come to work when I told him to rest.

"Kaya ko, anak. Mamaya ay mawawala na rin ito. Pagod lang siguro kahapon pero ayos naman ang pakiramdam ko ngayon."

He said, he can handle himself and that it was nothing serious. He was very certain that he would recover by the end of the day. Pero lalo siyang inapoy ng lagnat pagdating niya sa bahay noong wednesday ng gabi. Kinailangan pa siyang ihatid ng mga kasamahan niya sa trabaho dahil hindi na niya kayang tumayo mag-isa.