Hades

Chapter 42

I had hesitations about taking the pills, though I couldn't explain why. Everything that had been said made sense. My wolf was the only creature that had power to control me from within and the only creature that could change my physical traits. But I still eyed the pills, wondering if they would only make things worse. 

But, how could things be any worse than my own mate being afraid of me. 

I took the pills in the dosage that Keiko recommended. And it was awful at first. I had intense stomach pains and constantly felt like I was going to vomit, but I didn't know if that was from the pills or from the severe anxiety I was experiencing. Either way, I told myself it was worth it and continued to take the silver-infused medication until the headaches dulled to an annoying throb and my stomach was churning, but not making me feel quite so awful.

Still, I was wary of having any altercations. I knew that Noah was always lurking around, ready to help out whenever it was needed, but I worried that he would be too late, that Sebastian wouldn't be strong enough and I would get my wolf wanted.

So, I was back to creeping around the house, listening for Sebastian, hoping that I wouldn't accidentally stumble upon him. 

And it was about as effective as the first time.

"Charlotte," Sebastian said, choking a little on his pink drink.

"Sorry, I just came down for some food," I announced, giving him a wide berth as I went to the fridge.

"It's good that you're getting your appetite back," Sebastian pointed out, then softer, "I was getting worried. You were hardly eating anything for a while there."

"Trying to kill your mate kind of does that to you," I grumbled, snagging a bag of apple slices. I glanced at the rest of the fridge contents again, sad, but not surprised that there were limited options. Man, Sebastian hadn't even tried to cook.

"I can understand that," Sebastian murmured, then pushed out a bar stool outwards. "Come sit."

"I'm not sure..." 

"Come on, you're taking the medication and Noah is here if I need help. Besides, a few scratches on my arms never killed me. Colin and I fought each other hard than that," he encouraged, but I could see the tightness in his smile.

"What if we are repressing the wrong thing?" I asked, finally saying the words I had been so terrified of. "What if we got it wrong?"

Sebastian shrugged his large shoulders and took another sip of his pink drink. "Your wolf didn't like me for the second we met. You shifted when you attacked me the first time. It makes sense that your wolf didn't like the challenge and didn't appreciate having to bow to someone who wasn't your alpha. You are a beta after all and the transition into this wasn't graceful. Your wolf just might want a second chance to even the score."

His explanation made a bit of sense, but didn't seem intense enough to validate something like a blood debt. But I missed him and since I didn't have any information to counter him I could only agree. I sat down beside him.

"These pills make me feel so weird," I complained. "I can feel my wolf, but she feels so distant. I hate knowing that I'm repressing her."

Sebastian nodded his head, "Yeah, I didn't like it much either."

"You took these pills?" I asked, completely stunned.

"Take isn't the right word. Keiko had a few men pin me down and someone else forced them down my throat. It worked for a couple days, but my wolf was stronger. Eventually, it just seemed to make the final situation worse and by the time I was able to shift I would be angrier."