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Chapter 5

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"So when do I get to meet this mysterious Canadian?" Anushka wondered, pushing a large plate towards me. "It's been so long since we had someone knew in the palace. Royals only run in the same circles as other royals. What kind of food do you think he likes? Does this mean I get to try to make a poutine?" 

"I don't know, sometime after he gets fitted, briefed, and settles in I'll let you interrogate him. I mean, I did just put a stop to his whole vacation so he probably has a couple of things to deal with before he jumps into his role. I'd give him a few days, he didn't seem very eager." I picked up the fork and began shoveling forkfuls of the chicken and rice dish into my mouth. "How did you know that I needed your Biryani?"

"I've been working for you long enough to know your comfort foods," Anushka replied, untying her pristine apron from around her waist and setting it aside. She slipped her toque off, she let her thick, dark hair roll down her shoulders. It was so shiny and silky looking that I had always envied it in comparision to my flat blonde. "If you tell anyone I let my hair down in the kitchen I'll kill you," she warned then broke into a beautiful smile.

"You wouldn't be the first person to try today," I muttered, feeling my heart clench in my chest. God, just when I thought I had forgotten about it.

"Right, I'm sorry, that was insensitive," she backpedaled.

"It's fine, I'm just a little too sensitive, that's all. I never thought that taking over a country would be easy. But I thought that I would have my father here with me for the first couple of years. I also didn't think that I would be getting shot at on my first official day. This is something out of a horror film."

"It hasn't been a pleasant day for anyone," Anushka confirmed. "The good news is that we had planned to have a giant plated dinner this evening. With all of our guests sent home we happen to have a ton of leftovers, especially dessert."

"And what is on the menu for desserts then?"

"A chocolate pistachio dome."

"Sounds complicated."

"It has over twenty ingredients and all of them are bad for you."

"God, you spoil me," I laughed, then grabbed my dessert spoon.

Anushka stayed with me for a couple hours and though I tried to tell her to go home for the night she refused. After years of being under the same roof I still struggled to find the balance between her being my head chef and being my friend. I liked to think that she enjoyed my company, but I worried that she was only here because I was paying her. That was why everyone else was here, why not her too? But, she was the only person I relaxed around, the only person who saw genuine flares of emotion from me and, at times, I was more grateful for her than my own sister.

And when she brought up Jasper she knew right away. 

"You think he's handsome."

"In a traditional way, rugged. But that doesn't mean anything."

"You aren't going to be complaining about waking up and having a hot guard waiting outside your door. I know I wouldn't," she teased, her brown eyes alight with mischief. 

"I'm engaged," I protested.

"Not blind though, you might as well enjoy it while its here, right? There's no harm in looking." 

I let out a hearty laugh- the first real laugh since my father died- and it felt so good to be genuinely happy that I almost made myself cry. Instead, I scraped my plate clean and licked my spoon. 

"Would you judge me if I had another?"

"Never," Anushka vowed.

After eating way too much food, I was full of pistachio filling, Indian spices, and fuzzier feelings. I left the kitchens well into the night, telling Anushka she could take tomorrow off since I kept her late. She refused, of course, because there were few places she would rather be than in the kitchen. At least I had great food to look forward to tomorrow.

I slept soundly in my bed, half amazed that I fell alseep so easily after such an awful day. Yukon curled against me on my massive bed and I felt my eyes shut as soon as he started letting out soft snores.  He soothed me into slumber.

But, the fear didn't stay away for long. I awoke sweaty and panting. My whole bedroom was pitch black and I blindly fumbled around for the switch on my antique lamp. The room was illuminated in a soft yellow and Yukon gave out a grunt, not appreciating being woken up. But, even with the light on, my heart was pounding in my ears and my eyes kept flitting to all of the shadows. Could someone be hiding behind my ornate chair? Or in my closet? Or even under my bed?

I leapt off my bed and dove for the switch on the wall, my whole room flooded with bright white light. Still no intruder could be seen. I darted over to my heavy curtains and dragged them open, the morning light making my room even brighter. My skin still itched at the sight of all the places someone could be hiding.

For the first while I tried to be tougher than my emotions. I told myself that I was stronger than fear and I would not let it conquer me. So I sat down with a book. I would read a line. My brain would be filled with terror. I would reread the line. My fingers would start to shake. I would go over the same line for the third time. 

I gave up. So facing my fear head on was not the option, but maybe letting it out would be.

"Do you want to go for a swim, Yukon?" I asked as I was already rummaging through my closet for a swim suit. I found a cheap bikini and hesitated, wondering if it was better to risk being caught in this or ruin one of my expensive one pieces. I decided that no one would see me so who cared it had fit me five years ago and might not cover so much now then tied on the bikini. I   tugged a tee shirt and pair of shorts over top. Besides, it was early, no one would be up anyway.

Yukon trailed behind me as we walked through the palace. It felt so strange to be in my grand home like this, wearing sandals and a tee shirt my mother had bought for me years ago. She had lit up when she saw the giant cat on the front and bought it for me even though we both knew I could seldom wear it. It was one of the few carefree memories I had of her. Even if I gained forty pounds and couldn't fit in the shirt I would keep it. 

We made it outside without being seen which was no surprise considering the hour. Once Yukon saw green grass, he fled, racing right towards the swimming hole. I hadn't been swimming there in years, but my faithful rescue knew the way. I just followed behind him.

The large, clear pond of water was even more frigid than I remembered but Yukon still soared into the water. I inched in, one toe at a time until I was submerged to my chest. There, in the water, with the sound of the birds in the trees and far from the palace and guards I began to swim

I had been quite a good swimmer in my youth. Cecilia had opted for horseback riding as many royals do, but I had found peace in the pool. The water helped drown out the noise, helped me focus. So now, with my mind a mess, I began to move using the front crawl.

I worked my body until the water no longer felt cold. I moved until all I could think about was my breathing and my heart rate. I could pretty much hear my old coach in my head, correcting my movements and timing.

Then, when i began treading water with Yukon swimming in lazy circles around me, I saw a shadow move in the cover of the trees.

"Are you almost done, kitten? I'm going to get a sun burn."

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