Chapter XXI - The Silver Lining (Revised)

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"Let me repeat it, do you still want this?" Queenpin raised the snuff bottle higher.

"Keep it if you have the guts," I said slowly. "Only... Do. Not. Regret. In. The. Future."

Her sidelines murmured nervously beside her, "Return it to her. Who knows there is some unwanted history behind this snuff bottle. What if it is from-- from the em-- emperor?"

"Take it back!" Queenpin put the snuff bottle meticulously on the table and walked to her bed.

I slid the snuff bottle into my pocket and picked up a Green Jade Bangle.

"I know Herald Zhang treats me better than you. You must know that I am very close with all the princes. I can forget easily how bad people treat me, but I'll bear in mind the favour that people honour me and will strive to reciprocate. There is something that I must caution you: Whatever you do, think of how it'll affect your future." I approached Queenpin and took her hand. "I have always wanted to gift you some of my jewelry. It's just that I didn't know what you would like."

I put the bangle in her hand. Her sidelines greedily snatched the rest of the bangles and slipped them down their wrists. "Then we shall save all the etiquette and choose some good ones for ourselves. Thanks, Ruo Xi. Come, eat this salted pistachio. It is very tasty."

I grinned and joined them. As the adage said, "Money can compel the fiercest ghosts to work for you." No words suited this situation now better than this adage.

The next day, when I was washing the clothes, Herald Zhang called for me. He brought me to the center court, where I saw Ice Face hugging a baby in his arm.

I dashed towards him in jubilance. "This baby..."

"She is Thirteenth Brother and Miss Lv Wu's daughter." He smiled heartily and put her in my embrace. "The place where her parents stay now is not suitable for an infant. Hence, I have asked Father to grant her to me, until her parents can be released. She hasn't had a name yet. Thirteenth Brother wanted you to name her." His face turned sullen. "Poor child. She is separated from her parents even before she knows what is happening around her..."

"Let's name her Cheng Huan. It means that she will be able to bear all the miseries under her feet and will still stay happy." The baby grinned at me as if knowing that she had had a name.

Ice Face gestured to his servant and asked him to deliver Cheng Huan back to his residence. He then grabbed my hands, "How are you doing lately? Have your injuries recovered?"

"The medicine that you sent me is effective. I have fewer scars and blisters now."

His grip became tighter but his voice became softer. "You must stay strong these days. No matter what happens, you must face the obstacles with a cheerful heart." I nodded with a weak smile and he continued, "Will you regret to have always waited for me?"

"No..." I caressed his chin and his cheeks. "I know that moment will arrive one day."

After kissing my hand, he said, "It is late. I have to leave." With one final look, he left.

Looking at his drooping shoulders, I felt sorrowful all of a sudden. He seemed to bear tonnes of the burden on his shoulders, as he had to pursue the throne as well. The throne would determine Thirteen Brother's and my fate. This responsibility was crashing mercilessly upon him. I wondered how long he would need to bear the pain by himself. The tic-toc sound of Time running past blared in my ears. In a blink of an eye, wars landed the country and the Fourteenth Prince was assigned to lead thousands of armies to defeat the enemies. He fought courageously and triumphed every time. Perhaps the gory scenes in the battlefields had changed his mind.

One day, when he returned from his victory, he came to look for me.

"I have just known the reason why you were demoted. Years ago, I was the one who had asked Father to bestow you to me. I was thinking if you rejected Eighth Brother's love, at least I would be the best candidate to take care of you. I didn't know that you would rather accept punishment than marry me. Am I really that bad in your mind's eye?" His tone was calm.

He had grown. He used to be the riotous one.

Slowly, I said, not willing to irk him. I no longer had the strength to annoy anyone. "It's not because you are bad. You are good. Very good."

"I asked Father to bestow you to me again just now. But it all depends on you. No matter how long it will take, I will wait patiently. I have confidence that you will--"

"This year... Next year... Ten years later... No matter when or how many times you ask, my answer will always be the same." I walked to the well and sat on the brink.

"Is it that you already have someone in your mind?" This time, a tinge of irritation crept into his voice. As I didn't reply, his shoulders drooped slightly but he didn't get angry. "Fine. You have given me the answer. Is that someone Eighth Brother or Fourth Brother?"

"Is it meaningful to explore this matter?"

He sniggered softly. "I guess it is Fourth Brother then." He sat next to me. "He is sitting without worry every day in his residence, while you have to suffer here. Is it worthwhile?" He didn't sound like backstabbing. His sincere tone filled with his unconditional concern towards me.

I turned my head slowly to him. "Is it worthwhile for you to treat me like this?"

"Do you still remember that day when Suwan Guwalgiya Min Min realized that I am a prince, instead of your lover? She ran berserk and wanted to report our lies to Father. She would only forgive you if you triumph over her in a horse race. Your skill would never surpass her but you fought with all your might. From that day onwards, I swore to myself that I would treat you as my best friend, like how Thirteenth Brother treats you. Now, I made it."

"You don't have to feel that you've owed me because of that small favour."

"You can blame all you want. I had told you that I am a prince and Father would not punish me severely, but you did not. You... Uhm, you are still not willing to marry me?"

I grinned feebly to answer him.

"Fine. I will tell Father about your decision. Now, the only thing that I want you to do is to take care of yourself. Do not plant all those unnecessary woes in your head. Do you understand me?"

I nodded and he left without looking back. The next day, I had a visitor again. It was Xiao Shun Zi. He told me that the emperor had lost his appetite lately and he missed the desserts that I made for him. I agreed to return to the palace with Xiao Shun Zi and boarded the carriage. When the hooves clip-clopped on the gravel roads, a thought crossed my mind. If I remembered well, the emperor would die this year -- November 1661. Everything wouldn't be far now. Everything.

I believed this would be the last time for me to make desserts for him. Kang Xi Emperor... He was an idol whom I respected, feared, hated, and sometimes sympathized with. Sadly, all of these feelings would become empty soon. Now, I could only wait for his time to come without much anticipation. That night, I was ordered to remain in the palace, as the emperor felt glad and contented after eating the meals that I had prepared for him.

Would the emperor forgive me and instruct me to stay in the palace from today onwards? From the way the servants looked and talked, they didn't know that the emperor would die of the ailment he was having now. They believed that he had just caught small flu.

But some historians suspected that his sudden death was caused by him...

No, it couldn't be. He wouldn't do that. Would he?

Edited by Yvonne Kindle

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