Thicker than Water (Marauders Era)

24 June, 1978 - Tipsy

Remus was heading over to the table at the side of the Gryffindor common room to snatch a pastry or two and perhaps a second butterbeer when he saw her. She was sitting on the steps up to the dormitories, her knees pulled to her chest, back against the wall and clutching a half empty butterbeer bottle like it was lifeline. He froze halfway across the room, several questions hitting him all at once, none of which he had any answers to.

He approached her carefully, his nerves singing warnings at him that this couldn't be good. She'd said she was going to bed and while it was possible she'd changed her mind, Lavinia was hardly prone to sudden switches of her decision. And if she'd come here, why not come to her friends? Surely if she'd simply not wanted to go to bed yet, she would have at least looked for them. And this was Lavinia. And Lavinia only usually ran from her friends when she was having a bad night.

She didn't look at him when he sat down next to her feet, though he thought she must have seen him coming and was probably just ignoring him. Regardless of the reason, however, she continued watching the party, her expression almost nostalgic.

He sat next to her in silence for a long while, not knowing at all what to say or which questions to ask. He didn't want to make her feel unwelcome but... but why the hell was she here? He didn't want to make her think she couldn't just show up for no other reason than because she wanted to but what had chased her here? The more he watched her, the less he believed that she had come to Gryffindor tower to get something rather than to leave something else behind.

"I thought you were going to bed," he said eventually, breaking the silence between them.

She didn't immediately answer, still staring at the room in front of and below her. After a bit of a pause, she sighed. "I changed my mind," she replied flatly and utterly unconvincingly.

"Any particular reason why?" he pressed, frowning slightly at her. He couldn't pinpoint it, but something was off about her. He knew Lavinia was prone to sadness. Knew her life hadn't exactly thrown her kindnesses left and right but he also knew she didn't usually show it. And she was right now. Not much, but certainly more than usual.

She shrugged and her eyes slid away from the people in the common room to the bottle in her hands. "I decided not to tell you that," she informed him calmly, like that was a perfectly normal thing to say.

His frown deepened and his eyes fixed on the bottle in her hands, a suspicion beginning to nag at him. "Why didn't you come to talk with any of us?" he asked, deciding not to press that other point just now. "Surely you saw us from here," he added, looking around the common room to illustrate the point.

She nodded, her gaze following his. "I didn't want to ruin your fun," she answered softly, her eyes fixing on someone down below. He traced her line of sight and saw Sirius, dancing and surrounded by girls, as he usually was at these sorts of parties. Remus felt a sinking sensation in his stomach. Of course Sirius was surrounded by other girls. Because it was a party and he was hurt and, at least by Remus's best guess, he probably wanted to forget how hard he'd fallen for a girl who simply wasn't ready yet. He shook his head slightly, thinking that Sirius was going to regret this later. But right now... there wasn't much for it.

"You wouldn't have ruined anything, Vin," Remus informed Lavinia, a bit sternly, half hoping that if he said it sharply enough, if he meant it enough, she might actually believe him. "We would be glad to celebrate with you."

She smiled ruefully and looked directly at him for the first time since he'd sat down. "I already ruined your fun," she countered and the lack of emotion in her voice scared him slightly. "Instead of dancing and laughing you're sitting here with me. And you're worrying. I can see it in your face," she added when his frown flickered. "And if they see me here, their nights will be ruined too." She sounded for all the world like she was laying out a simple and logical argument in the most patient and gentle manner possible. "Because that's what I do," she continued, a tinge of emotion in her voice for the first time. "I ruin things." She looked away as she said these last words, though that soft, sad smile stayed on her face. "I'm sorry," she added, glancing briefly his way when he didn't immediately respond. "I don't mean to take away from a celebration. But... well. It's safe here."