COMMON ROOM: A Short Story Anthology

A Poisoned Pear by Morgan Lloyd (Wattpad username: Arminius)

A POISONED PEAR

by Morgan Lloyd (Wattpad username: Arminius)

Mentor: Chandler Baker, author of ALIVE, releasing June 9, 2015, from Disney-Hyperion

***

When the call came, I was sitting in a motel lobby with a mug of coffee, dead tired from my last case. I’d just had the joy of chasing Scaramouche Ripley, who’d taken his magical gift of persuasion into the telemarketing industry, which was, though very lucrative, illegal as all hell. He was also slippery as a lubricated eel, and I’d been forced to run through three states before I caught him with his britches down in a gas station bathroom. After I slapped him around a bit with the towel dispenser and hogtied him with the toilet paper, he agreed to come quietly, but even without much of a battle it was an exhausting hunt.

I sipped the coffee, not as black as I usually took it, but I didn’t have much of a choice in the matter. Someone’s ringtone went off with an annoying deedle-deedle, and it took me until the third ring to realize it was mine. I grabbed the old piece of junk from my pocket and flipped it open.

“Johannes Skathi. Rogue-hunter. Whaddya want?” I said flippantly.

“Do not forget who you are speaking to, Adept Skathi,” said an immaculate voice on the other end of the line.

Inwardly, I groaned. Speaking with Councilman Reichstag was a lot like going to the dentist; you tried to avoid it for as long as you could.

“What I want is the arrest of Louhi Ravana,” he said.

“Louhi who?” I asked. “I seem to have forgotten her.”

“You haven’t. She had a clean record, but her master died last night and she fled the scene when the Guards arrived. She’s suspect number one in a murder trial now, and it’s your job to fetch her back alive,” Reichstag said.

I could just imagine him fingering his diamond necklace as he talked. Reichstag had, in my opinion, quite an unhealthy fascination with diamonds. I guess it was true what they said, that diamonds were a girl’s best friend. It wasn’t like Reichstag had any others.

 “I hear and obey, Lord,” I said in a nasal tone, snapping the phone shut. I’d had enough of Reichstag’s voice as I could handle. It was time to go hunting.

Rogue-hunting was widely considered to be one of the worst jobs available for a wizard. But I had no choice; I wasn’t exactly a straight-A student, or even a straight-C student. Old Leodegran over at the employment agency had actually laughed when I had handed over my transcript, telling me the only company that would hire me was the local fast-food place. I still might have been able to land a better job, but I punched the smug bastard, which somewhat limited my options. The Agency of Law was one of only two to offer me a job, as a hunter of all those who broke magical law. The other was the Agency of Birthday Parties, but even I had standards. I took the job with the law.

The job had its perks, I suppose. The parties thrown by the agency were legendary, and the government was willing to allow some rule breaking as long as we got the job done. And it was the closest I could get to following in my dad’s footsteps, as there was no way in hell I was going to get into the Council Guards. Paid well enough, too; enough for me to rent my own place and enough for me to buy a Harley on the black market. She was probably stolen, but it didn’t matter to me; she was a real beauty.

At the time she was parked outside my room, kickstand down. My equipment was attached to one side, and I double-checked it before revving up the engine. My sword was strapped to the other side, the sunlight glistening off the blade. Her name was Dämmerung, and she was my only love. It was too good for a hunter, of course; this was a Council Guard’s sword, something I loved to point out to Fenri back at the agency.