The Damaged

Chapter Eighteen

We all walk into the filled dining hall. There's more people here than usual, you can barely hear the water in the Chasm now.

"I'm so nervous" Mia tugs on my and Tara's arms.

"You'll be fine," I remind her, "we all will."

All the initiates stand in a crowd to wait for their results, I somehow find myself right next to Four.

"Hey" I grin at him. He has a roll of bread in his hand.

"Hey" he greets; ripping off a piece of the bread, offering it to me. I didn't notice until now that his hands are shaking.

"Are you okay?" I ask when I take the piece he's holding out.

His eyes are distant, as if he's worried. The thought makes me want to laugh; Four will most likely be on the very top of the rankings. "Just fine."

Max suddenly appears on one of the tables in the middle of the room, the talking settling down but some stragglers keep their conversations going in the distance.

"A few weeks ago, a group of scrawny, scared initiates gave their blood to the coals and made the big jump into Dauntless," Max says. "To be honest, I didn't think any of them would make it through the first day, but I'm pleased to announce that this year, all of our initiates attained the required scores necessary to become Dauntless!"

The room is filled with cheers and whoops. Though the initiates remain quiet, no one's sure where they stand in rankings; even with the reassurance that no one will get cut.

I glance at my friends. Zeke puts his arm over Shauna's shoulder. Tara and Mia hold hands. I look at Four and take his shaking hand into my own, his blue eyes meet mine momentarily with a subtle grin.

"No more delays," Max says. "I know our initiates are jumping out of their skin. So, here are our thirteen new Dauntless members!"

Behind him, a large screen glows all of our names in the order of our ranks. I didn't realize I was holding my breath until I became lightheaded again.

The first name I read is Four's. One. He's number one out of thirteen. I next search for my friends. Tara takes eight with Mia at nine. A smile spreads across my face.

"Mal!" Mia shrieks with tears already running down her cheeks. "Congratulations!" I've come to realize I haven't read my own name.

I scan the list again, starting on the bottom but my name is towards the top. Three. I'm number three on the list.

"We did it!" Tara laughs as she pulls me and Mia into a group hug. I try to leave my stiffness for the night to take in the Dauntless embrace.

"I'm so proud of you guys, congratulations" I smile at them.

A hand takes me by the shoulder, turning me away from my friends. Four looks at me with a grin himself, I chuckle.

"Who would've thought a couple of Stiffs would beat all these people?" I smile at him. He rolls his eyes.

"Would it be wrong for me to kiss you right now?"

Rather than replying or waiting, I cup his cheek and close the distance between us. He still feels warm and secure, his arm snakes around my waist to tug me closer.

When our lips pull apart, I look into his eyes with our foreheads pressed together.

"We did it," I whisper loud enough for him to hear.

"I knew you could," he grins.

He's about to go in for another kiss when someone pulls me out of his embrace. Shauna groans at the intimacy and hugs me in her arms, Zeke wraps his arms around the both of us.

People swarm around us, congratulating Four and his ranking. Strangers, people who I recognize by face. We're all officially welcomed by our faction.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

"That's too much!" I yell as Zeke fills my cup with brown liquor, everyone laughs.

"Don't get her too drunk, she gets depressed when she has more than five" Tara smirks, I kick her under the table.

We all sit at the same table for once; mainly because the once initiate table is filled with stranger Dauntless we have yet to meet.

All of our plates are filled with heavy amounts of food, someone's put a pile of cake in the middle for us all the share; unless it's Uriah's. He usually takes that amount for himself.

"Drink up" Shauna pushes the cup closer to me. I've been pressured into taking a 'shot', whatever that means. All I know is that I have to down the drink in one gulp.

"I hate this" I groan again, taking the cup and tipping it all into my mouth. The stinging starts as the waterfall enters my throat. I make a face as the cup falls back on the table. Everyone whoops.

"I want to see drunk Mal" Zeke smirks, already pouring more into my cup. Four tilts the bottle back up when my cup is halfway filled.

"Awe, protective boyfriend" Shauna laughs. My cheeks burn more than my throat.

We never labeled our relationship, I didn't expect to think about it tonight; especially when we're both under the influence of alcohol.

Four, with three drinks in him already, gives her a look before settling his eyes on me. "I just don't want you spending another night in the bathroom."

"Gross" Zeke makes a face.

I moan. "I couldn't stop vomiting, if you must know."

The rest of the night is filled with laughter, drinks, and our bellies filled with banquet food. Sometime in the middle, Four cut off my drinks before the fifth and replaced it with water. That didn't stop me from occasionally slurring my words and needing to lean on something or someone for help.

I'm in the middle of a conversation when Four laces his fingers with mine and leads me away from the celebration.

"Where are we going?" I ask with a grin, letting him guide me up the railless paths to the top of the Pit and through the lobby of the Pire.

The main doors shut behind us as we walk into the night, still hand in hand but it feels like we're headed in two different directions.

"Pretty" I mumble, staring at the sky. I'd like to think one day there'd be stars to gaze at, but all there is to see is grey outlined clouds.

"Mal. I need to tell you something" Four faces me, only a few of his words are slurred. He must've had more drinks than I did.

"And what's that?" I take his other hand. The sound of a train echoes in the distance.

"I think I love you" he side smiles.

I stand for a moment; contemplating whether or not he's telling the truth. Alcohol can really change someone's judgment.

"You're going to have such a headache tomorrow, Eaton" I chuckle.

Four smiles and presses a kiss to my forehead, one on my cheek, my nose, then my lips. Putting more push into this one, I replicate his every move. Even though the disgusting taste of liquor lingers from both of our mouths.

He pulls away when the train rumbles the tracks next to us. Grins are stuck to our faces when we turn and walk towards the sound.

The train races passed us, we stand as close as any Dauntless would; one more step and we'd be crushed. I smile at the wind, my hair flying everywhere and my clothes inflating.

As my hair settles down, I see a dark figure at the end of the last train car. The closer it gets, the more I see her dark curly hair and hooked nose; just like Four's.

We both stand in confusion when the train goes deeper into the city, the woman practically hanging out of the train to watch us as we watch her.

"I think that's enough drinks for tonight" Four mumbles once the train is out of sight. I nod in agreement.